After the rain washed out the majority of Free Practice 2 on Thursday, eyes were cocked askance at the lowering skies above the Monaco harbor.  Would we get a wet Qual session at the most ridiculous circuit on the calendar?  Let's take a look at the provisional grid for the 2015 Grand Prix of Monaco:

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Ahhhhh, Monaco.  The place Formula 1 likes to imagine every race is like.  The glitz, the glamor, the champagne, the megayachts in the harbor, the casino, the women, the money.  For some reason, I can't imagine Spielberg, Austria, or Mexico City, or Spa-Francopants, or even Austin, Texas being the center of glitz and glamor (though Austin's the center of Weird).  But that's fine.  The sport can have its delusions because at least once a year, they're real.  This weekend the F1 Circus makes its way to the Principality for the 2015 Grand Prix of Monaco.  Let's take a look at the track map, shall we?

Essentially unchanged since the addition of the Nouvelle Chicane (Turns 10/11) in 1986, though there was a minor reprofiling of the Swimming Pool (Turns 13-16) in 1997, Monaco is the slowest circuit on the calendar.  It's also the narrowest, has both the slowest (The Hairpin) and one of the fastest turns (Turn 9, the Tunnel) on the calendar, and is the only place on the calendar with a measurable risk of drivers ending up in the water.  There's no "straight" here, just less curvy areas, and I'm fairly sure that the stretch from the end of the Nouvelle Chicane to Turn 17 is flat... the rest is uphill, downhill or seemingly both at the same time (the exit to the tunnel loses altitude except for a car-length-sized bump uphill).  It takes about six weeks to construct the circuit by putting up the armco barriers, safety fencing, bleachers, activating the pit lane, bolting the curbs into place, welding the drain covers down, that sort of stuff.

Just as the Monaco Grand Prix is different from other races in many ways, so too is the race weekend for Monaco.  Instead of Friday-Saturday-Sunday, instead we have Thursday-Saturday-Sunday.  Such arrangement allows the billionaires to return from their jobs in Switzerland or England on Friday... or not, as the case may be.  It's also one of the few that we here in the US get to see on one of the "Big Three" networks!  Here's the broadcast schedule:
Thursday
7a - 830a: Practice 2 on NBCSN live
Saturday
7a - 830a: Quals on NBCSN live
Sunday
630a - 9a: 2015 Grand Prix of Monaco, live on NBC
As always, all times are Pond Central; check your local listings.  Post no bills.

This is also Memorial Day weekend, meaning that Sunday is the Racing Fan's National Holiday as well.  We get Monaco in the morning, the Indy 500 in the early afternoon, and the Coca-Cola 600 in the late afternoon/early evening.  That's a lot of racing, and no, I'm not gonna try it this year.  The open-wheel races, yes, but NASCAR I'll be happy if I get to catch the end.  It's a busy weekend, but a fun one!  See ya 'round, racefans!

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1

When I was a kid and thought about F1, I always thought it was about street courses. Now, of course, it ain't true; there are a few but most races are on purpose-built courses. But there are some, and the idea of doing 150 on city streets has it's attractions...

Posted by: Steven Den Beste at May 18, 2015 06:44 PM (+rSRq)

2 Steven, your comment got me wondering... just how many street circuits were there while you were growing up?

It turns out that, using the very loosest restrictions on the term "street circuit" as a guide, there were only five, plus one special case... and in the late '50s/early '60s, it seems weird to think that people would have thought of them in any way similar to our destination this week!

There was the Ain-Diab circuit.  Looping through and outside of Casablanca, it was only used for two F1 races.  It was a non-points paying race in 1957, and was the final race of the 1958 season.

The original Circuit de Spa-Francopants in Belgium formed a rough triangle between the three villages of Malmedy, Stavelot and Francorchamps.  Nearly 15km long, it was run on public roads and indeed passed through these small towns.  It has been in use in one form or another since the 1920s.

The Pedralbes Circuit ran through a suburb of Barcalounger, Spain.  It was the site of the Spanish Grand Prix in 1951 and 1954, and was retired for safety reasons after the LeMans disaster in 1955.

In 1958 and 1960, the Circuito da Boavista in Oporto, was the site of the Portugese Grand Prix.  It ran over cobblestone streets, crossed light rail tracks, and through residential neighborhoods.

Then, the special case: the Circuit de la Sarthe in France, home of the 24 Hours of LeMans.  Like Spa-Francopants, it ran from the villages of LeMans to Mulsanne to Arnage and back, all on public roads.  While not a F1 race, it is a legendary track all its own.

None of these would have been as glamorous as Monaco, I wouldn't think, save for LeMans.  Chances are, a young SDB might not have ever heard of them.  But Monaco is the face Formula 1 presents to the world, particularly back then.  Indeed, here in the US, the only F1 race we would have seen regularly was the Grand Prix of Monaco, via ABC's Wide World of Sports program.

Posted by: Wonderduck at May 18, 2015 11:30 PM (jGQR+)

3 When I was a kid, I had this beautiful Corgi black open wheel racer, the "John Player Special". I have no idea what happened to it. But for some reason the F1 posts occasionally make me think of it. I have no idea what the history of it is though, or why Corgi made one.

But it was one sweet toy car.

Posted by: Mauser at May 19, 2015 02:36 AM (TJ7ih)

4 Mauser, we BOTH had that one.  It was the Lotus 72D of Emerson Fittipaldi.  He won the WDC in 1972, y'see...

I had a few Corgi cars from around that time... that was the most memorable, though.

Posted by: Wonderduck at May 19, 2015 03:26 AM (jGQR+)

5

Indeed, here in the US, the only F1 race we would have seen regularly was the Grand Prix of Monaco, via ABC's Wide World of Sports program.

That's probably why I have that impression.

Posted by: Steven Den Beste at May 19, 2015 08:33 AM (+rSRq)

6 Also, F1 played up the glitz and glamor of Monaco as much as it could.  Not to say there weren't other places that were glamorous... I mean, Rio was on the calendar... but Monaco was the face F1 presented to the world whenever it could.

Still do, actually.  There's very little glitz to Hungary or Sochi, for example.  The idea of glamor doesn't exist when you're camping in a muddy field at Silverstone or there aren't enough portaloos at Spa.  Other than the Opera House in Sydney, one doesn't much think of glamor and Australia together (no offense, Pixy!).

But almost any TV commercial you see for F1 will have a shot or two of Monaco in it, no matter where the race is.

Posted by: Wonderduck at May 19, 2015 09:06 AM (jGQR+)

7 On one hand, you would think F1 would take a lesson from their own advertising:  this is what people want to see.  On the other hand, I doubt there's anything they can actually do about it.  Street circuits are, I would bet, inherently more dangerous than more-modern purpose-built tracks...although you would think F1 would at least *try* to make the tracks a bit more interesting.

Posted by: Ben at May 19, 2015 09:23 AM (S4UJw)

8 ...you would think F1 would at least *try* to make the tracks a bit more interesting.

Alas, "interesting" and "safe" are usually diametrically opposed to each other.  If Monaco didn't have history behind it, the sport wouldn't race there.  If someone proposed a similar race in, oh, Gstaad, they'd be laughed out of the room.

Maybe Miami.

Posted by: Wonderduck at May 19, 2015 01:34 PM (jGQR+)

9 Maybe Miami.

Oooooooooooooooohhhhhhh.  That would be *awesome*.

Posted by: Ben at May 19, 2015 01:47 PM (S4UJw)

10 >If someone proposed a similar race in, oh, Gstaad, they'd be laughed out of the room.

Not least because motorsport has been banned in Switzerland since 1955!  Though I understand they're making an exception specifically for Formula E.

Posted by: flatdarkmars at May 19, 2015 04:56 PM (lnEp2)

11 ...motorsport has been banned in Switzerland since 1955!

You think I'd remember that from all the times they mentioned it on Top Punch Gear.

...they're making an exception specifically for Formula E.

Have you seen a Formula E race?  They're not making any exception at all.

Posted by: Wonderduck at May 19, 2015 08:29 PM (jGQR+)

12 That's the car!

Now if I knew what happened to it....

(My buddy Mitch has the Corgi Spectrum SPV. Now that's a find!)

Posted by: Mauser at May 20, 2015 02:26 AM (TJ7ih)

13 Mauser, I had like 10 Corgi cars growing up.  Half were F1 or Indy cars, the rest were unremembered... except for one.

The Aston-Martin DB5 as driven by James Bond. 

Here's the thing... I was young.  I remember playing with them before I moved to Duckford, so... six years old?  Around there, surely. 

It seems fitting, somehow, that I can remember many of the Corgi cars I owned 40 years ago, but most of childhood before high school is a sad blur.

Posted by: Wonderduck at May 20, 2015 09:29 AM (jGQR+)

14 Depending on what you mean by street, surely the Nurburgring is/was a "public road" of some kind at some point? And used for F1 in the past? Though obviously lacking in urban bits.

Posted by: AlanL at May 20, 2015 04:21 PM (Ic3bA)

15 AlanL, the Nurburgring was a purpose-built race circuit, specifically to get away from racing on public roads.  It's about as non-street-circuit-y as it's possible to get.

Posted by: Wonderduck at May 20, 2015 04:31 PM (jGQR+)

16 The Nurburgring certainly is a purpose-built race track, and it certainly is very unlike the typical street circuit.  However, the pedantic bastard in me cannot let this conversation pass without observing that the Nurburgring is also operated as a public toll road, open to all comers who want to turn a lap.  So AlanL is also correct that it is, indeed, a public road.

Posted by: flatdarkmars at May 20, 2015 05:33 PM (lnEp2)

17 FDM, that's not what he was saying and you know it.

Posted by: Wonderduck at May 20, 2015 10:13 PM (jGQR+)

18 Well, yes and no. I was aware of the public being allowed in, as witness many hilarious videos of people with enough money to buy M-series BMWs and GT-series 911s but not enough skill to actually drive them. 
But I also had some sort of vague notion that it was a conversion of a pre-existing country road and not a purpose build race track - which I now know is not the case. 

Posted by: AlanL at May 21, 2015 01:08 PM (XGUPV)

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Hold the phone!  Stop the presses!  From border to border, coast to coast and all the ships at sea, we have breaking news!  Flash!  Here's the grid for the 2015 Grand Prix of Spain:

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I totally forgot to watch.  Completely spaced on today being Friday.  However!  I did say that I'd get back to you about if the new livery helped the McLaren go faster or not.

^{A McLaren, blood dripping from its wings, continues hunting for fresh prey.}

Jenson Button ended up 7th at the end of P2.  His teammate, HWPMBNSTITF, was solidly in 11th.  So I think we can safely say yes, at least for today the Dark Charcoal and Red livery gave the McLaren chassis a speed boost.  Never mind any other gewgaws and doohickies they may have added to the bodywork, it was all down to the livery.  For what it's worth, Button is still over 1.5 seconds behind times set by the Mercedes of Lewis Hamilton.  In other news, Lotus has installed a particularly aggressive batch of upgrades to the E23 chassis for this race.

All joking aside, and please note they put the tires on backwards, Lotus had a spot of bother out on the circuit today.  Lettuce Grosjean was turning a lap at speed when the entire engine cover tore off like it was never attached.  Normally I would think that this would do terrible things to a car's pace, but this is Lotus we're talking about here.  Ahem.  Here's what it looked like when Lettuce made it back to the pits:

Quals in the morning.  The quals report probably won't be up until the afternoon, though.

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The slow boat from Bahrain has finally made landfall in the Old World, and the F1 Circus has disembarked in the traditional home of racing boredom, Barcalounger, home of the 2015 Grand Prix of Spain.  Let's take a look at the track map, shall we? 
I call it a boring race because it almost always is.  For many, many years, the Circuit de Catalunya was the winter home for testing, with every team putting in thousands of laps annually.  As a result, every tiny rise, every small dip, any bump, crack or irregularity is known and processed through the filter of the teams.  Every single inch of this circuit is mapped and imprinted directly onto the cerebellums of the drivers, to the point that the race has spawned some legendary processions.  Indeed, if there was ever an argument to be made for the necessity of gimmicks like DRS and KERS in Formula 1, this track right here is it.

Over and above all that, there's nothing particularly challenging about this Spanish track.  It's a burrito from Chipotle is what it is.  Filling, and you know you've eaten something when you're done, but real burritos are so much better.  It wasn't always that way... I remember when Sector 3 was ridiculously fast: Turn 10 was a sweeper instead of a hairpin, and the final turn ran in a single arc from Turn 13 to the exit of Turn 16 and cars barely slowed for it.

But those days are dust, now and forever more.  At least we'll have the Legendary Announce Team to bring us coverage over paella and tortas from the Basilica Templo Expiatorio del Sagrado Corazon de Jesus.  Here's the broadcast schedule:
FRIDAY
7am - 830am: Practice 2 on NBCSN
SATURDAY
7am - 830am: Quals live on CNBC
SUNDAY
630a - 9am: 2015 Grand Prix of Spain on NBCSN. 

All times are Pond Central, of course.  Add an hour if, for example, you're in a hospital in Virginia.  Subtract two hours if you're having a Mission burrito in San Francisco.  And if you're in the Midwest, have a breakfast pastry with your sangria.

We'll see you then.

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There was a nasty wreck during the ARCA series race at Talladega today.  Austin Self got a little squirrely and spun in the tri-oval, not an uncommon occurrence.  As his car flailed around, it caught the hard-charging car of Brad Smith right in the nose.  Along with the obvious damage, Smith's throttle was stuck open.  He went up the track, smacked the outside wall, and then...

Rescue crews actually had to cut Smith from the wreckage of the car, but he was able to walk under his own power to the ambulance, though unsteadily.  Taken to the infield care unit, he was later helicoptered to the nearby University of Alabama-Birmingham Hospital for further observation. 

I mention all this because of a screenshot I saw of the wreck... to whit, this one:

The particular stretch of wall that Smith impacted had what's called a SAFER (Steel And Foam Energy Reduction) Barrier installed in front of it.  When hit, it's designed to crumple like a beercan, reducing the strength of the impact before the car makes contact with the concrete wall behind it.  That's why Smith's car looks like it's smooshed to half its size: part of it is inside the SAFER barrier. 

During the NASCAR Xfinity race at Daytona back in February Kyle Busch had a similar accident, except the wall he hit notably didn't have the SAFER barriers installed.  He suffered a broken right leg and left foot.  Certainly there were differences: impact angle, size and weight of the cars, so on and so forth... but that one man could walk away and the other is sidelined and will remain so for an unknown amount of time may very well come down to the way the wall deformed.

F1 doesn't use SAFER barriers; instead, they use tire walls which really do much the same thing, or TECPRO barriers at four or five circuits.  TECPRO is the same idea as SAFER, just with much more foam and less steel.  It's used mostly at Monaco, where it protected Sergio Perez from what would have been a catastrophic injury in 2011.  Compare that accident to Jenson Button's in 2003, when they had a tire wall instead... no give at all.

In most cases for F1, tire barriers are sufficient.  Walls are usually far away from the track, and when they're not, a car isn't likely to hit them (on straightaways, for example).  Tire barriers are "good enough" in those circumstances, combined with the way F1 cars are designed to absorb impacts.  A SAFER barrier might actually hinder the way a F1 car takes damage, come to think of it.

Well, there you go.

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