October 03, 2007
F1 ON SPEED: SHANGHAI!
With the stunning, devastating news that Ralf Schumacher won't be driving with Toyota in 2008 ringing in our ears, somehow we must carry on with our lives.
For it will be good for all readers of The Pond to resume our daily activities, though with a heavy heart and tears in our eyes. And, if at times during our day, we find ourselves feeling we can't go on, that F1 no longer is worth watching and life is no longer worth living, remember that he would not want us to mourn for long. Instead, he would have us continue to love the sport that taught us so much about him... so lets do so, together.
Ralf would have wanted it that way.
Friday at 1am, SPEED Channel brings us LIVE coverage of P2.
Much later in the day, from 1159pm 'til 1am, we get F1 Debrief, SPEED's recap show... which will be covering, of course, the Japanese Grand Prix. That'll be must-see TV, for sure!
Saturday, from 1am to 230a, we get live coverage of Quals.
Sunday brings us the penultimate race of the season, LIVE, from 1230a to 3am, with a replay from 330p to 6p. Now you've got no excuse... watch, won't you?
All times central.
October 02, 2007
October 01, 2007
Ahhhhhhhh...
When I moved into The Pond seven years ago, you could count the number of households with broadband on the feathers of one wing.
Then the broadband explosion occurred, yet The Pond was, due to location, unable to get connected. Cable never made it out here because of "The Trench", an eight-lane highway, between us and Duckford. We were too far out in the boonies with too small a customer base for DSL to be profitable for the phone company. Dialup was my only option, and AoL was the only provider that wasn't a long-distance call.
Two weeks ago, the apartment complex put a flyer in The Pond's mailbox: "HIGH SPEED INTERNET NOW AVAILABLE!"
It's cable broadband via a new provider in the area... and let me tell you this: a d/l speed of 5 kbps via dialup was the fastest I could get. The 26 kbps that I got when I took the screenshot above was with ONE peer available. I can't wait to see what happens when I try a recent torrent.
I'm a happy duckie right now.
UPDATE:
Duckie very, VERY happy.
September 30, 2007
F1 UPDATE!: JAPAN DRIVER QUOTES!
*DRIVER QUOTES OF THE RACE:
"Well, that was different. Except me on the podium, that is. That's still the same. Gee, where's Alonso?" - Lewis Hamilton
"I couldn't see Kimi during those last few laps, because my mirrors had steamed up. Don't ask what I was doing to make them steam up, please." - Heikki Kovaleininininnie
"mrmmgmrm mrmmrmmml cold mrmrlmlmrrmmlm wet mrbmlmblm mbmbl." - Kimi Raikkonen
"It’s a crazy thing to be a racing driver - on the one hand you’re scared, but on the other, you’re having the time of your life because every moment you’re right on the edge, even on the straights." - David Coulthard's Chin (note: real quote)
"For god's sake, I finished fifth today, and I wasn't ever on camera. Not even when I crossed the line. Everybody else got a camerashot. What's a guy gotta do?" - Giancarlo Fisichella
"I was told I was going to win the Championship. 'It is in the bag,' Todt said, 'no problem.' I'm holding my breath until I'm declared the champion. mmmmph!" - Felipe Massa
"I lost places at the start because my car ingested water into the air filter, and I had no power. The car also ingested water into the cockpit, struts, steering wheel, engine cover, rear wing, brake ducts, six-point harness, gearbox, and driver." - Robert Kubica
"It's great earning a point for Toro Rosso. Wait, what?" - Vitantonio Liuzzi (note: Liuzzi was docked a point for passing Adrian Sutil under the safety car... leading to...)
"I missed earning Spyker's first point by one place. We were SO close. Wait, what?" - Adrian Sutil
"Spyker. Now we're being beaten by Spyker." - Rubens Barrichello
"Y'know, the car was actually EASIER to drive without the front wing..." - Jenson Button (note: Immediately after the safety car left the track, he was involved in an incident that removed said wing. He then proceeded to drive for another five laps without it.)
"I think we also should think of the Japanese fans as they were watching right to the end when it was so cold and wet!" - Sakon Yamamoto (note: real quote)
"It was a very difficult race from the beginning. Even behind the safety car the conditions were really bad - there was a lot of spray and it was hard to see anything on the straight. Then when the safety car came in the race was very wet and visibility was really, really poor. I think it was a tough afternoon for everyone out there, very cold and wet, and obviously I am disappointed with this result. Safety car.” - Jarno Trulli (mostly real quote)
"Mommy." - Grizzly Nick Heidfeld (note: pulled off-track and parked the instant Lewis Hamilton took the checkers.)
"It was very cold in the cockpit. And wet. Don't forget wet. Did I mention it was wet? And cold. At least it put out the fire quickly. I would like to thank the fans who have supported us through such cold, wet weather. Safety car." - Takuma Sato
"I tried to retire, but they sent me back out. No, really, I tried to retire: my job at the Berlin McDonalds started the next day, and I had to grab a flight." - Ralf Schumacher
"“It was a very difficult day here in Fuji. Very wet and cold conditions made it very hard for all the drivers. And cold. Wet. Are you sensing a theme here?" - Ant Davidson
"Probably the worst conditions I have ever raced in, very wet and cold. I couldn’t see a thing, and the rain caused an electronics failure that made it impossible to for me to turn right. But, on the other hand, I won today's NASCAR event." - Nico Rosberg
“I made a good start and the race was going well. Then, with the final safety car, I was behind Lewis and Mark and exiting Turn 13, I looked to the right and saw Lewis going really slowly, I don't know why, but I thought he had a problem. Probably he was heating his brakes. Then, by the time I looked forward again, I was already in the back of Mark's car and I think he had also reacted to Lewis. I apologise now to Mark because I ruined both our races. Now I'm going to go kill myself." - Sebastian Vettel (note: mostly real quote)
“That was a completely disastrous finish. Vettel... ...did a very good job of hitting me very hard under the second safety car. I think today he will have learnt a very valuable lesson.” - Mark Webber (note: real quote. We here at F1 UPDATE! know we saw a slightly less printable quote immediately after the race, something about "f#%&ing rookies..." If you saw that quote, please let us know in the comments. It was brilliant, and now it seems to have been scrubbed from the 'net.)
"AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!" - Fernando Alonso
"It was very bad out there today. The only way I can describe it is if you close your eyes and run through your house at high speed - then you have some idea of how it was.” - Man-mountain Wurz (note: real quote)
So, that ends this cold, wet episode of F1 UPDATE!. Next week, we'll have coverage of the Chinese Grand Prix... with special guest commentary from Vaucaunson's Duck!
So stay tuned!
F1 UPDATE!: JAPAN!
Back in the good ol' days, every race at Fuji started like this:
Today? Not so much.
*SPA IS CALLING, THEY WANT THEIR WEATHER BACK: For only the fourth time in F1 history, the race began behind the safety car. Why?
Because the wet weather on Saturday became even worse by the race. In fact, this was probably the wettest race we at F1 UPDATE! have ever seen... and that includes this year's European Grand Prix. See, that race just had one downpour. Today's race had medium-to-heavy rain all day long. So much rain fell, in fact, that the first 17 laps were run behind the safety car. While we believe it was a bad decision to do that, at least the race did complete in the two-hour time limit.
*DID WE MENTION THE RAIN?: This view from Takuma Sato's cockpit just says it all:
The surprising thing was that there were so few accidents.
*OH, THE RACE! FORGOT ABOUT THAT...: Once the safety car went away, we actually got a pretty decent race, with some heavy implications on the Driver's Championship. Lewis Hamilton was possessed by the spirit of Michael Schumacher and turned in a masterful wet-weather drive, winning by nearly 13 seconds. Fernando Alonso, on the other hand, spun and crashed out of the race around the 2/3rds mark, and now finds himself 12 points behind his teammate with two races to go, a nearly insurmountable gap. Felipe Massa is now out of contention altogether, and Kimi Raikkonen in third is hanging on by the skin of his teeth.
*DRIVER OF THE RACE: Heikki Koveleaininnie. Renault gambled in qualifying, setting both their cars up for a dry race. The gamble failed miserably, dropping both Heikki and Giancarlo Fisichella way down the grid, and seemingly costing them any shot at a podium. Nevertheless, Heikki, running no rear wing to speak of, and therefore suffering from a tremendous lack of grip, managed to run his Renault up into 2nd place. He then had to fight off his fellow Finnish racer Kimi Raikkonen in the last lap to stay in second. Considering that, by all rights, he should have been off-track a dozen times today, Heikki Koveleaininninininnie gets the DotR.
*TEAM OF THE RACE: Renault. Rain may be the great equalizer, but it also makes a mockery of all the plans and strategies that go into a F1 race. No team looked good today: McLaren had their first DNF, Ferrari peed one right down the leg of their firesuits by starting their cars on completely undriveable Intermediates, RedBull/Toro Rosso managed to go from podium finishes (and a possible win) to wrecking themselves (see the "MOOOO-oove" below)... the list goes on and on. But there was Renault, coming in 2nd and 5th with either an example of marvelous improvisation or incredible good luck, and their best race of the year.
*MOVE OF THE RACE: On the final lap of the race, Felipe Massa was frantically trying to get past Robert Kubica for sixth place. For the last third of the lap, Massa was either alongside, immediately behind, or just a smidge ahead of Kubica, but not past him. Then he basically played a game of chicken with the Pole, getting his tires so close to the BMW that Kubica could have counted the number of tread grooves on the Ferrari's 'full wet' rubbers. Kubica peeled off, then swung back in towards the red car. Massa, who'd spent the majority of the day off-track anyway and probably had a good feel for the asphalt runoff areas, intentionally blew the final turn. Probably screaming "Screw the rain" in Brazillian, he then buried the accelerator and outran Kubica to the finish line. We have no idea how the FIA Stewards won't investigate the racing activities there, but for now, Massa gets the Move of the Race for that startling sequence.
*MOOOOOOO-OOOVE OF THE RACE: Toro Rosso's Sebastian Vettel had it all today. Everything was going his way, from becoming the youngest driver in F1 history to lead a lap, to sitting pretty in 3rd place after Alonso pronged his McLaren, bringing out the safety car. Just ahead of him was Mark Webber in his RedBull, the junior team following the Big team. Both would have been the best finishes ever for their respective teams, and Webber had a distinct chance at a win (as Hamilton seemed to be having problems after being bumped earlier in the race). Then it all turned to dust, as somehow Vettel rammed into the rear of Webber's car, destroying the Red Bull's suspension and knocking him out of the race. Vettel's Toro Rosso limped back to the pits with it's front-left tire at a 45-degree angle to the direction of travel. From hero to goat in one second. The last shot we saw of Vettel was of him in the back of the Toro Rosso pits, helmeted head in his hands, his body language suggesting that he wanted to learn more about seppuku, in a hurry.
Honorable mention goes to the SuperAguri mechanic who decided to lean over and manually (i.e., with his fingers) open Takuma Sato's fuel cover after he had just had nearly a full tank put in, thereby causing this:
*DRIVER QUOTES OF THE RACE: will be posted Sunday afternoon.
September 29, 2007
F1 QUALS: JAPAN!
As expected, the rain never stopped from P3 (which was actually cancelled, not just postponed as earlier reported), but the fog did lift enough for the medevac helicopter to be able to fly, so Quals were able to take place (though delayed about 10 minutes).
"Rain," as the hoary saying goes, "is the great equalizer." Just because it's hoary, however, doesn't mean it isn't true. Jenson Button got his Honda into Q3, much to everybody's surprise, and he'll be starting 7th. Given his success in Hungary last year, I think it's becoming quite clear that he's one of the best wet-weather drivers on the grid (and given his car this season, maybe THE best rain guy). The real shocker, though, was Sebastian Vettel driving his Toro Rosso into Q3 for the first time in team history. He'll be 9th tomorrow, an impressive performance for such an insipid vehicle.
The big news is that Lewis Hamilton pipped his teammate by .110 of a second to take pole. McLaren timed his final push perfectly, and he wound up the last driver on track when the timer hit zero. Combined with the wet-but-drying conditions, he was able to chase the least-wet line around the circuit, and managed to file off the rough spots he had had earlier in the session.
So, an all-McLaren front row. That means we've got an all-Ferrari second row, of course. Once the weather turned damp, it was pretty clear that the Red Team wouldn't be on pole; Ferrari this year has had a lot of problems in the wet... of course, that's relative to McLaren. It's Raikkonen 3, Massa 4, almost a half-second behind the polesitter.
The rest of the grid:
5 Nick Heidfeld BMW
6 Nico Rosberg Williams-Toyota
7 Jenson Button Honda
8 Mark Webber Red Bull-Renault
9 Sebastian Vettel STR-Ferrari
10 Robert Kubica BMW
11 Giancarlo Fisichella Renault
12 Heikki Kovalainen Renault
13 David Coulthard Red Bull-Renault
14 Jarno Trulli Toyota
15 Vitantonio Liuzzi STR-Ferrari
16 Ralf Schumacher Toyota
17 Rubens Barrichello Honda
18 Alexander Wurz Williams-Toyota
19 Anthony Davidson Super Aguri-Honda
20 Adrian Sutil Spyker-Ferrari
21 Takuma Sato Super Aguri-Honda
22 Sakon Yamamoto Spyker-Ferrari
You'll note Ralf Schumacher up there at 16. He actually made it to Q2, but never turned a lap in that session. That's because, after Q1 had ended, he decided to 'pass' Sakon Yamamoto. Actually, he pulled the sort of manuever that earned Takuma "Suicide" Sato his nickname. I've watched his banzai dive repeatedly now, and I STILL can't figure out what he was trying to do. In a race, it would have been foolhardy but bearable. On the cooldown lap after Q1, it was just stupid. The only thing that may mitigate the circumstance is the weird failure of the Toyota's rear wing when the car's FRONT tire hit the Spyker. There may have been a rear suspension failure (that led to the collapse of the rear wing... we've seen that combination before) on the Toyota that prevented Schumacher from being able to whoa up before he embedded himself in the Spyker.
Finally, while I have no numbers to back it up (and with it being 230am as I type this, I'm not going to go search for them), I believe this is the worst qualifying performance for Takuma Sato in Japan ever. He usually seems to find another gear when he gets home... maybe he just really loved Suzuka?
Right. Race tomorrow night, at 11pm central time. I'm not sure when the F1 UPDATE! will be posted, as longtime friend and occasional commenter here at The Pond, Vaucaunson's Duck, will be here to watch along!
That's a 'good-news-bad-news' thing, unfortunately. It's good that he'll be here! It's bad that he's in Duckford, though, because his father, Dr John, had multi-bypass cardiac surgery earlier this week. Vauc and his wife, Geese, are in town to help with Dr John's recovery.
Dr John is a remarkable fellow, and I'm VERY glad he's doing well after the surgery.
More after the race, or as events warrant!
September 28, 2007
PLAYOFFS, BABY!!!
Go Cubs, Go / Go Cubs, Go / Hey Chicago, Whaddya Say? / The Cubs Are Gonna Win Today!
F1 QUALS: BREAKING NEWS!
The weather at Fuji International Speedway is, apparantly, great for ducks.
Not so good for helicopters or F1 cars, though. The morning practice was delayed by fog (by FIA rules, if the medevac helicopter can't fly, everything is put on hold until it can), then shortened. They're saying that quals might be held in the wet.
Now THAT'LL be interesting!
More after quals, around about 2am Central time.
F1 Practice: FUJI!
First off, let's just get this out of the way right now:
Fuji ain't no Suzuka.
That being said, our first look at this new track (yes, yes, it's been around for ages, I know, but it's been 30 years, okay?) shows promise. There's some very clever bits to the course, like turns 10 & 11 (they aren't a chicane... they're two alternating turns very close to each other, but they aren't a chicane), which might be one of the trickier combinations in the sport. And while 100R, the big 180-degree righthander, isn't a patch on Suzuka's lamented 130R, it's still pretty keen. And that mile-long front straight is something special, particularly with turn 1, a tight right-hander that's similar to Shanghai's turn 1 (in that it just dives downhill when you get into it) tacked on at the end.
Team McLaren threw down the gauntlet in P2, then kicked anybody who dared to try and pick it up in the head, with Lewis Hamilton leading the way over his teammate, He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named, by a good .200 of a second. There was almost a half-second gap back to #3. The Ferraris seemed to be having a hard time of it, particularly Phil Massa, who seemed (to use some baseball terminology) to be a bit wild outside. Massa seemed to have some serious understeer going on, as at least twice (possibly more; I'm working from memory here) he found himself going cross-country at what I think was 100R (I could be wrong; I'm just as new to this track as everybody else).
Renault was surprisingly quick, at one point giving the Big Two a run for their money, though fading a bit when Ferrari & McLaren got serious. Still, they outpaced BMW, who is definitely the third-best team on the grid (interesting news from the LAT... since they're locked into 2nd in the Constructor's Championship, BMW has stopped developing their 2007 chassis altogether, and are now concentrating solely on next year's car).
There were a lot of four-wheel skids going on today as well... almost drifting-level slides. Just another example of how close the car-driver combination in F1 is to complete and catastrophic failure at all times. Or it just could be that the track is completely green.
I had high hopes for Fuji going into today (one could say 'mountainous' hopes), and while those epic heights weren't scaled, the track is certainly more than a molehill. Even before the race, I'm prepared to say it's a better track than France, Spain, Hungary and Brazil (of course, the Duckford Speedway and it's 1/5th-mile dirt oval is better than Interlagos). Afterwards, we'll see where it rates for sure.
There's some potential here, that's for sure.
September 25, 2007
F1 On Speed: JAPAN!
I warned you weeks and weeks ago...
That's right, Pole Position jokes all weekend! This year, of course, the Japanese Grand Prix is being held at Fuji International Speedway, home of the very first GP of Japan in 1976. However, 1977 was the last time the F1 circus visited the track in Shizuoka Prefecture.
Toyota purchased the track in 2000, and after three years of renovations and reprofiling, made it into their exclusive test track in 2005 (much like Suzuka is owned by Honda, by the way). For obvious reasons, that means that Toyota is pretty much the only team with any experience at all on the course, meaning that, for once, practices will actually MEAN something... and SPEED will be live with their coverage of practice from 1159pm Thursday night until 130am Friday morning! Finally, something watchable without having to wake up before the milkman!
Because of this lack of tracktime, amongst other reasons, Fuji is stacking up to be very interesting. The remodel did away with the huge sweeping righthander that led back to the straightway (replaced by all the fiddlybits on the left-hand side of the trackmap) that showed the true skill level of the Pole Position player (Wonderduck Sez: I was pretty darn good), one thing that stayed the same is the front straightaway... which is now the longest in F1, at 1.5 kilometers. Should make for some fun numbers in Qualifying, which starts at 1159pm Friday, and goes until 130am Saturday morning.
Break out the Suntory and Kirin Saturday night! At 11pm, the curtain goes up on the 2007 Grand Prix of Japan, and Speed'll have it live and plausibly in-person, Smarmy notwithstanding. For those of you weaklings for whom 11pm is too late, there's a replay at 330pm Sunday afternoon.
By the way, if you're wondering why it's called Fuji International Speedway, here's a clue:
September 24, 2007
John Force Injured, But Okay
Steven's second-most-favorite driver, John Force, suffered a serious accident in today's Fall Nationals at Ennis, Texas.
He had just finished a race against Kenny Bernstein when Bernstein's car appeared to clip the final timing cone. The cone was launched into the side of Force's car, which then split apart. The back half, with Force in it, slammed into the wall when the braking chute was released. The front half snapped across the track and collected Bernstein's car, who escaped with only minor injuries.
Force broke his left ankle and wrist, and had a 'severe abrasion' on his right knee. I think it's safe to say that he's pretty lucky. Please note that the dramatic footage of the crash ISN'T where Force is. The camera follows the wrong part of the car... just keep an eye on the chute.
Of course, the cars are designed to split apart in case of an crash, so as to seperate the engine from the driver. But, and this is important to note, there wasn't a crash in this case UNTIL the car split apart. Very odd indeed.
Steven's favorite driver, Ashley Force, is fine... and you can take that any way you want, wink wink nudge nudge.
September 22, 2007
Where Ya Been, Wonderduck? (and a Duck In Anime, too)
Actually, a better question might be "where's your boss been, Wonderduck?"
He got married a couple of weeks ago, and has been off on his honeymoon... leaving me the only person with keys/alarm code/etc etc etc for the Duck U. Bookstore, as well as the only full-timer.
In the past two weeks, I've worked around about 110 hours, 10 out of 12 days, and so on. Not too terribly bad, until you realize that about half of the hours were spent ALONE, with no staff to help.
So I've had very little time to watch much of anything, be it Anime, F1, or whatever. "Normal" blogging will resume soon.
Now for one of my favorite 'ducks in anime' pictures of all time... because it's so moving:
From Hidamari Sketch, some episode that I didn't keep track of.
Darn it, when will you humans realize that DUCKS ARE PEOPLE TOO? You can't just leave one of us in the dark, alone, like this!
