Wonderduck's Pond

May 11, 2022

A Dog's Age, A Duck's Life

Well, it has been a while, hasn't it? There are reasons for that. Firstly, I've been a bit under the weather... maybe a week and a bit ago my stomach rebelled against the proletarian concept of food, one Stalinistic Purge after another.

Then there's the infection. I think I've mentioned it's antibiotic resistant. Turns out it's not resistant to all of them. Unfortunately the ones that still work are IV-based. So the decision was made to throw another PICC line (nurse: "It's a mid-line.") into my arm. At least this caused no issues, but I'm hooked to the tree for about two hours per day.

Despite my taking a prebiotic, the antibiotic ... I'll just call it "Jeff" from now on... has done a number on all the good bacteria. I mean, Jeff has done a better job on that than the real target.

Anyway, there's less blood usually so that's a positive. I'm seeing a specialist tomorrow with a non-trivial chance that a catheter is stalking me. I used to hate dentists, but at least they don't try to work via your bellybutton.

There's been a lot of not sleeping going on too. My roomie, who I'll also call Jeff, is 65 looking like 80, and goes to bed right after dinner. Lights out and silence, and he tries to get me to do the same. Jeff doesn't care if I sleep, he just wants dark and quiet. To which I have of course said no.

Jeff also thinks the light of my phone screen is too bright, and the sound of a bag of chips being opened too loud. As is my bed as I adjust it to a good sleeping position six hours early. To express this dislike, he unleashes the Litany of Profanity and the Panoply of Sounds.

The Litany is uninteresting; only five words that get strung together in combinations. The Panoply is different. From hums to express displeasure, to a Lecter-style intake of breath, to a raspberry, these sounds definitely indicates bad moods. The big one however is a heavy breathing thing... like he's trying to growl, maybe. Last night he added a new one... whacking his table hard with something.

Of course that one dragged me out of a rare bit of sleep. I mean I'm a night owl... 3am is no stranger to me... but I've been trying to be polite and nice, which results in me waking up at 2am and not being able to sleep again. At least last night I expressed my displeasure with "what the hell is your problem?" His muttered "no problem" seems like he didn't expect me to respond.

I've resorted to official complaints, and two nurses have gotten involved too. Apparently I'm not his first roomie, just the most recent.

In good news, visitors have been a thing! First it was the folks, then Vaucaunson's Duck all the way from California, and The Librarian is coming next week. All of which has been a welcome change from being the youngest inmate and having nurses and CNAs only to talk to... and they all yell. I assume it's because of deafness of the other folks. I've taken to speaking quietly while they yell, hoping to reduce their volume subconsciously. Mixed results.

The 6th Hospital entry is coming... this one is probably the worst to talk about because there's very little funny involved and I need there to be some.

Lunch is being passed out... allegedly chicken parm and pasta. We'll find out.

Posted by: Wonderduck at 12:07 PM | Comments (10) | Add Comment
Post contains 592 words, total size 4 kb.

1 You didn't ask for advice, so I'll keep my fat mouth (mostly) shut, but I am compelled to mention just one thing: if you are not already familiar with fecal transplants, you may want to look into that.
Anyway, sorry you are having such a rough time. I hope the specialist will be helpful!
Also, you haven't answered the most important question: Does the hospital TV show F1 races?? I'm sure Jeff, for one, would appreciate a nice early qualifying session.

Posted by: Kathryn at May 12, 2022 07:40 AM (8548M)

2 Not only engaged in protracted battle with your own body but you've got a passive-aggressive obnoxious roomie as well? That's double-plus ungood and then some. I hope at least one of those situations gets resolved and soonest.

Posted by: GreyDuck at May 12, 2022 08:20 AM (rKFiU)

3 I'm adding 'Litany of Profanity' to my most useful phases.

Posted by: astro at May 12, 2022 07:58 PM (9U4tg)

4 *phrases, dammit. I assure you I'm not going through a profanity phase.

Posted by: astro at May 12, 2022 08:06 PM (9U4tg)

5 Kathryn, sadly ESPN is not a thing here. I did, however, watch the US Grand Prix in Miami last weekend, the first race I've seen in a long time.
Good lord but the cars look different. The actual racing seems to have improved, and Mercedes appears to have peed the new tech regs down the legs of their collective firesuits so that was fun.

Posted by: Wonderduck at May 13, 2022 09:18 AM (DB9Lx)

6 Yeah, the new aero is wild. No one knows what's really the fastest yet. But the Mercedes zero sidepod concept doesn't appear to be it.

It's been good racing between LEC and VER so far this season. It remains to be seen how respectful and clean the racing will be another ten or twelve races down the line...

Would you like a subscription to F1 TV for your birthday?

Posted by: Kathryn at May 13, 2022 06:21 PM (8548M)

7 Earbuds and an audiobook narrated in calm tones, or earbuds and music. Does great things for blocking out annoying noises.

Posted by: Suburbanbanshee at May 13, 2022 08:58 PM (sF8WE)

8 I checked with F1 TV's help line, and they don't have a gift subscription option, but I can set up a new account with a throwaway email and then give you the credentials for that email and the account. Drop me a line to the email I use to comment here if you'd like to do that. You can also go back and watch some of the races you missed last year too (I think...have not tried it myself, but they claim you can watch old races). Some of them were pretty good.

Posted by: Kathryn at May 22, 2022 06:47 AM (8548M)

9 You're much too kind, but it isn't really necessary. I watched the race as much for form's sake... I refuse to not watch a US race, not when every viewer counts... as actual interest in the race.
I'm not sure what to think about the Miami circuit. It's a shame they couldn't swing running the race in the GTA Vice City part of Miami...

Posted by: Wonderduck at May 22, 2022 07:07 AM (DB9Lx)

10 All righty, well, the offer remains open if you change your mind :-)

Miami was OK, I guess. The proposed Vegas circuit looks terrible. I think as an event, a Grand Prix weekend in Vegas will be fantastic, but as a race, it does not look interesting. Also, it will be on at like 10pm local. I'll be in bed. (granted, I say the same thing about Melbourne, Japan, etc.)

Posted by: Kathryn at May 23, 2022 01:55 PM (8548M)

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