Progress Is Being Made... Somewhere
I haven't even started the writeup for Kantai Collection Ep08 yet, though I will today. Likewise the creativeness thingy is stalled for reasons. Nothing is flowing right now is all, either words or creative stuff.
Success is a state of mind, they say. Well, my state of mind is currently not positioned for success. More like self-doubt, sadness, and general disgust. I make no apologies for that; it's not like I want to feel that way. As they say back in the old country, "feh."
Stuff inbound.
UPDATE a few hours later: Wonderduck is broken. It's depression. I even know why, I just thought it was going to hit a week ago and when it didn't, I thought I was in the clear. Damn. I'm going back to sleep. Probably best for everybody.
Antici...
Allow me to set the scene for you, if I may. It is Ten in the morning on Thursday, and Wonderduck is not happy. From the moment he woke up some 90 minutes earlier he has had a massive headache. Further, his left ear feels like it contains a half-gallon of fluid and he can hardly hear anything from it. As if that wasn't enough, roughly half of the nail on one of his big toes had decided to go forth and attempt to found a new lifeform. To repeat: Wonderduck is not happy.
The phone rings, it's an automated message telling him that he's the lucky recipient of a trip voucher for two to his choice of *click*. As Our Hero puts the phone back on the desk, it rings again. This time glancing at the Caller ID before answering, he sees the number is showing as "000-000-0000". This one gets the "send directly to voicemail" button, where it's later revealed to be two seconds of silence. No less than five minutes later, the phone rings again. Mind you, this third call quite possibly equals the number of times Wonderduck's phone has rung all month. However, this one shows the area code of Duckford, so with some trepidation he answers it.
It's the place he did the testing for last week. They'd like to interview him for a job, can you be here at 1215pm? Yes? Great, see you then. Wonderduck is heading for the shower even before he hangs up the phone. Things go as one would expect... shower, get dressed, sit around Pond Central for an hour in a dress shirt and tie before it comes time to leave... when Our Hero gets the surprise of his life.
It had snowed sometime since he last left Pond Central, and the Duckmobile has a good two or three inches on it. Let us take stock of the situation, shall we? Wonderduck is wearing a suit and tie, dress shoes, it's 14°F with a brisk breeze, his snowbrush is in the car, and he's suddenly on minus time. What's a seriously annoyed duck to do?
Well, in this case, he commits the cardinal sin (for those of you in the American League, the blue jay sin) of not actually cleaning off his entire car. The hood remained covered, though being blown away by airflow, the snow on the roof rapidly migrating to the rear window, and the Duckmobile probably looked like there was a wedding train trailing behind it, but he's going to be on time.
The interview started out on an ominous note, by mentioning my test results. In short, the interviewer was afraid that my massive pulsating brain could perhaps be a detriment, the job too boring for one of my vast intellect. Our Hero quickly made it clear that he would be thrilled with a job like that, as to be blunt he's tired of working in fun and exciting jobs, like retail positions in a world where concepts such as "civility" and "common human decency" don't apply to customer service jobs. The rest of the interview goes well, though Wonderduck does notice an uncomfortable squelching feeling from his shoes, apparently caused by melting snow. I should know something by the middle of next week.
1
Congrats. Let us celebrate your return to the labor force with the ritual consumption of alcohol!
Posted by: Avatar at February 27, 2015 02:00 AM (zJsIy)
2
If it occurs, then yes, the rituals must be observed. Until then, my hopes, much like my beers, are not being raised.
Do not take this to mean that I disapprove of your gun-jumping in any way, however!
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 27, 2015 02:05 AM (jGQR+)
3
"Overqualified" pfaugh! Lack of income is a perfect qualification.
But okay, the Kampai's are on hold pending verification.
Posted by: Mauser at February 27, 2015 05:37 AM (TJ7ih)
4
BOOYAH! Order the beer and greasy cheeseburger, amigo, Daddy's doin' the Time Warp next week. (Yes, I noted the title. You're not a Carole King fan, I don't think.)
Posted by: The Old Man at February 27, 2015 06:46 AM (o6+UC)
I like ketchup as much as the next guy, but no, that wasn't my line of thought.
Having said that, I love the song Jazzman. Hell, why not, here it is. "He can cry like a fallen angel / when rising time is near..." Baby, gimme chills.
Look, as I was a young fledgeling, Momzerduck was definitely what might be today called a sandal-wearing granola-eater, at least as far as music went. Carole King, James Taylor, CSN, Carly Simon, Cat Stevens, Harry Chapin, all that sort of stuff lived on the turntable. So while I might not be a fan, per se, it's not like I don't have a solid background in the stuff!
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 27, 2015 10:06 AM (jGQR+)
6
I've been trough the "you're overqualified and too intelligent for this job" before. After it happened a couple of times, the HR director told me that HR departments would consider me a problem area because I would expect proper reward and treatment for my work, and I would probably deserve it because I would work harder then most of the people they usually hired. It would create hard feelings all around and they would have to let me go. The bottom line is, if they were convinced I had high expectations and was a strong self-motivator, then I wouldn't fit in.
Of course, that could have been to just make me feel better, too.
Don't know if hearing that helps or hurts, but it's intellectually fascinating.
Posted by: Ben at February 27, 2015 11:27 AM (DRaH+)
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 25, 2015 11:37 PM (+rSRq)
14
Trilobites are a powerful symbol of Mad Science, suggesting that the other seemingly-ordinary ingredients will be combined in ways that defy the so-called "laws" of physics.
-j
Posted by: J Greely at February 26, 2015 01:06 AM (1CisS)
Posted by: Siergen at February 26, 2015 09:55 AM (ohSuC)
16
Wasn't there a kit car or some limited-production thing that used a trilobite as the hood ornament? That rings a bell for some reason.
Posted by: Ben at February 26, 2015 07:18 PM (DRaH+)
17
Siergen: "Wasn't there a kit car or some limited-production thing that used a trilobite as the hood ornament?"
You may be thinking of "Evolvo," by pun- and fish-happy artist and favored collaborator of paleontologists Ray Troll.
Page 95 of Rapture of the Deep: The Art of Ray Troll (University of California Press, 2004):
"I pitched the idea of an "Evolvo" concept car to various institutions for many years; finally, in 1999, the Denver Museum of Nature and Science fulfilled my dream when they hosted my exhibit there. I acted as art director for Chuck Parson, a Denver-based artist, who tricked out the automobile with many of my icons. There was a talking-head video of me in the back explaining my work; in front, a lifelike sculpture of Charles Darwin sat at the wheel, while a lobe-finned fish (Eusthenopteron) occupied the passenger seat. The trilobite hood ornament was the sweetest touch. The current mayor of Denver, restauranteur/raconteur John Hickenlooper, is the proud owner of this art vehicle."
Hickenlooper is now in his second term as governor. I have no idea whether he still owns the car eleven or twelve years later, though I suppose that as a Democrat, accepting evolution is not as much of a political liability as it might be on the other side of the aisle, so maybe he does...
Posted by: Ad absurdum per aspera at February 27, 2015 02:30 PM (4sBqR)
18
No, not what I was thinking of. Asi de from that, however: I did not know that...what an interesting story!
Posted by: Ben at February 27, 2015 03:48 PM (QoQdM)
Kantai Collection Ep07
For reasons I can't put my finger on, I've been reluctant to do this particular writeup. No, it's nothing having to do with the episode itself: it's very much a Kantai Collection episode, with no great surprises or anything. It may have something to do with my right knee feeling like it's packed full of fish sticks and chunks of metal, meaning that spending any amount of time in my computer chair is a little painful... remember, this is the leg that I bounced off a row of bricks a few months ago. There's also what feels like an awful case of weather-related malaise. Understand, this winter has been relatively mild, particularly when compared to the continuing nightmare the East Coast has been dealing with. However, Duckford has been grey for pretty much the entire season. It's been grey and snowing, or grey and cold, or grey and cold and snowing, and only rarely has the Burning Orb of Light made itself visible in the sky. I don't think I'm susceptible to SAD, at least not like some people, but I'll be darned if the symptoms don't match. Ah well, whatever, you're not here to listen to me kvetch about my aches and pains, you're here to listen to me kvetch about Kantai Collection. Last episode was the Great Curry Conniption, so what great dealings will Ep07 bring us? An eating contest? Nah, Akagi winning would be too obvious there... ooh! I know! It's the "Mutsu has a light lunch, smiles as she plays with a kitten, then takes an afternoon nap" episode! Yes, please! (sigh) Y'know what? I'm not even gonna guess, lets just jump right in, see where that gets us. Raise anchor, all ahead slow, allons-y!
Ah! It appears that RKO has picked up the production duties of the show, very good. I can't help but worry, however... those guy wires look awfully slack considering their job. The last time I saw guy wires that, the mast in question was being disassembled, a task you literally could not pay me enough to do. Still and all, the antenna at the top must still be working, because the Naval District has received a communique.
A communique via morse code, no less. Actually, I assume it's actually Wabun code, the Japanese version of morse, but as I understand none of the factors involved, I have no idea if I'm correct or not. For some reason, this lack does not particularly bother me at the moment. Anyway, the message is that Operation MO is approved, and that they are to provide a carrier fleet and a support fleet... and here is where my emergency brakes kicked in, because Operation MO is better known to us here in The States as the Battle of the Coral Sea... we gonna see some stuff go down.
Literally, if lil' miss Abyssal Carrier up there has anything to say about it. I can't help but notice that there's a startling resemblance between the Carrier and The Librarian at times. They both wear hats, the facial structures are the same, they both can do the flashing blue flames of power from the eyes... uncanny. It goes without saying, of course, that I've never seen the two of them together in the same spot...
1
Absolutely agree: the show is telegraphing the inclusion of Midway, but there is *no way* Midway can be presented in any way that resembles the actual battle.
Posted by: Ben at February 22, 2015 01:08 PM (S4UJw)
2
If they showed Yorktown being damaged but withdrawing, did they show Lexington sinking?
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 22, 2015 03:14 PM (+rSRq)
3
They did mention that one Wo-class was sunk. Didn't show it though (well, a bomb went right into her creepy hat-thing's open mouth, then it cut away...)
They're gonna re-fight Midway, aren't they? Broken codes -and- a two-phase recon pattern earlier than it ever happened in the war. Fubuki... Fubuki, you read Shattered Sword, didn't you?!
Posted by: Avatar at February 22, 2015 04:27 PM (a38fD)
As a matter of fact, they didn't show Lexy (heh) sinking, but it's referred to. All the "cleaning up" happened off-screen.
Av, it's possible that Foobie read Fuchida's Midway: The Battle That Doomed Japan. He chastises the IJN for not doing a two-phase search in that book... even though it wasn't how they did things at the time, and indeed nobody even thought to perform one... including Fuchida himself. As it was, a two-phase search wouldn't have helped at Midway anyway, since Kido Butai got lucky with the Tone 4 plane.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 22, 2015 04:48 PM (jGQR+)
5It was a good episode, but it definitely points the arrow directly at
Midway...one can't be blamed for thinking that Midway is going to
be a bloodbath for the shipgirls.
If the show
does parallel the real-life course of the Pacific campaign, pretty much the
entire rest of the series will be downright grim, with maybe a few cutesy-pie filler episodes thrown in for maximum mood-whiplash. (BTW, one might note that hideous, unspeakable abominations would be playing the role of the United States Navy...)
Posted by: Peter the Not-so-Great at February 22, 2015 08:30 PM (gt7kt)
Midway (June 1942) was definitely terrible for the IJN, but the next year or so wasn't so awful. It wasn't great, either, but things didn't really go sour until the second half of 1943 when America's new production started coming online.
Between then, the IJN sank Hornet and Wasp and badly damaged Saratoga, and in general gave more than they got in the waters near Guadalcanal until nearly the end. (Though that's where Fubuki was sunk.) After the Americans landed on Guadalcanal (August 1942), the Japanese didn't advance any further but it was also a long time before they started retreating (February 1943).
The Solomons campaign was pretty close to a stalemate for a long time, and the Americans only really started to move forward after their new production started fighting.
Not counting Midway, the really big disasters for the IJN happened much later: Philippine Sea (June 1944) and Leyte Gulf (October 1944), which between them pretty much finished the IJN as an effective military force.
If this show does Midway (and does it honestly) it's going to be painful as hell, but what comes after that won't be merry but it also won't be hell.
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 22, 2015 10:40 PM (+rSRq)
7
(small correction: it was Enterprise that was badly damaged, not Saratoga.)
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 22, 2015 10:46 PM (+rSRq)
8
I'm operating under the assumption that Midway will be the climax of the series.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 22, 2015 11:39 PM (jGQR+)
9
That would be strange, ending on a catastrophic defeat? Unless they're going to rewrite history?
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 23, 2015 06:17 AM (+rSRq)
10
"How I enjoy slice-of-life shows. With bombs." You make a compelling argument there, I must admit.
Part of me thinks they're going to take their historical-allegory thing only up to a certain point, then "rewrite history" to give our POV characters a happy ending.
Part of me thinks they're going to give the old "nice boat" ending trope all new meaning...
Posted by: GreyDuck at February 23, 2015 08:35 AM (AQ0bN)
11That would be strange, ending on a catastrophic defeat? Unless they're going to rewrite history?
I'm guessing it'll be a victory. One way they could do something grim yet still not kill the main characters, would be to have CarDiv2 (Hiryu and Soryu) head to Midway while CarDiv1 goes to the Aleutians. Midway goes bad, but Akagi and Kaga come down and deal with Yorkie, et al.
Carriers are lost, but the Big Two are okay and Midway is a win. I'm not saying they're gonna do that, but it's a way they could pull it off and still fit in the game's version of reality... I gather the Aleutians ("Northern Ocean Hime") is a Boss Battle in Kantai Collection, the game...
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 23, 2015 10:30 AM (jGQR+)
12
I expect everyone to come along for the ride, honestly. Real life Shokaku was put into the yards, Kancolle-wise she'll be out in a day even without a bucket. Real life Zuikaku's air group was shot to pieces, Kancolle-wise we didn't see this happen (and, well, when you build planes out of bauxite and they're piloted by fairies, replacing them is just plane easier...)
They can completely scratch the Aleutians off the hit list. That's two more carriers available.
They can turn their broken codes around, put false data in there... lowers the chance that they'd get caught in mid-strike.
On the other hand, it's unlikely that the Abyssals would have one of their air groups go flying completely in the wrong direction. Honestly, as well, Midway-as-really-fought has a total lack of action for the surface units in a way that would be unsatisfying for fans of the show. For all we know, they'll have things go much more according to the original Japanese plan - they polish off the base, and then a full general fleet engagement follows, Mahan with all the trimmings and a night battle after. (Nobody tell Sendai!)
Posted by: Avatar at February 23, 2015 01:33 PM (a38fD)
The real Battle of Coral Sea is the first major sea battle in which the fleets never came close enough to see one another. All of the combat was fought with air strikes.
I assume that wasn't the case in the most recent KanColle battle, though.
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 23, 2015 01:40 PM (+rSRq)
14
Did you miss the part where Fubuki shoots Yorkie in the face, or where I say that "Foobie Force finishes off the rest of the Abyssal fleet", Steven?
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 23, 2015 02:23 PM (jGQR+)
15
Sounds like they're already taking liberties with history, since the American fleet didn't get "finished off".
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 23, 2015 02:37 PM (+rSRq)
16
"...replacing them is just plane easier." Ba, dum, and pish, Avatar...
Posted by: GreyDuck at February 23, 2015 03:50 PM (3m7pZ)
17
We're basically getting WWII ver. 2. What's obsessing me is whether it's intentional or just lazy writing. I'm leaning toward intentional, as I can't conceive of using WWII as template, and sticking as closely to it (from certain points of view) as they have, without intent.
Posted by: Ben at February 23, 2015 04:24 PM (DRaH+)
18...whether it's intentional or just lazy writing.
There's thought behind this show... a lot more of it than we're giving the show credit for, I suspect. One thing for certain, I'm thinking more about this one "after hours," as it were, than any series in a long, long time.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 23, 2015 05:13 PM (jGQR+)
19
In a sense it's still lazy writing; so long as they're taken out any kind of analysis for "reasons for the war" and substituted "because we are being attacked by mysterious monsters," it ain't exactly that deep.
At the end of the day, what's getting Wo-tan out of bed where people can shoot her eye out? We've got no clue; up until this episode we didn't even have any reason to believe there was a mind there at all (and we still don't know if there's a sentient person, but at least she's theoretically capable of facial expression, hm?)
I get why that's an aspect that a Japanese game company doesn't want to dive into, but oy.
Posted by: Avatar at February 23, 2015 09:34 PM (zJsIy)
20
The Aleutian Islands Campaign and Midway were both in the Summer 2014 event. The Northern Princess (Dutch Harbor) is a disgustingly adorable loli who demands the player leave the Zero, a reference to the Akutan Zero. (In her second form she demands the Reppuu.) This was a two front war in-game, but the anime might have the Aleutian campaign with the setback of losing the Zero and then Midway.
The official 4-koma says the Abyssals are the souls of ships from all sides that are enveloped in grief and hatred, which is their motivation.
Posted by: muon at February 24, 2015 06:23 AM (XIprt)
21
Muon, there are at least five (as possibly as many as 10) different manga adaptations, and none of them are listed as the "official" series... indeed, none of them seem internally consistent with each other, let alone anything else.
The game hasn't announced what the Abyssals are, nor, more importantly, has the anime. Until either defines the Abyssals existence, anything is possible.
Please refrain from muddying the waters like that. We had a talk about this during my HSotD writeup. Don't make me do anything drastic, okay?
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 24, 2015 09:52 AM (jGQR+)
22
Well, I'm obviously not the target audience for the show and I do find both concept and execution as disturbing as it's cute. And yet, I watched the new ep today, basically because synchronicity and the red threads of fate demanded it.
(By which I mean that the only Japanese ship I know anything about actually appeared on the ep.)
So I'm very much looking forward to Wonderduck's take on this next one, and I hope he catches the in-joke for those of us who are older fans.
Posted by: suburbanbanshee@gmail.com at February 25, 2015 05:57 PM (ZJVQ5)
Of Wonderlics and Wonderduck and Testing, Too
They said that the testing for the position could take "up to three hours." Psh-yeah, right. That's got to be just padding, right? Right. The first thing they had me take was a Wonderlic test.
I don't know if any of you know of the Wonderlic... football fans will have heard of it, but maybe not anybody else? Anyway, it purports to be "an aptitude test for learning and problem solving for a range of professions." Okay, cool. A score of zero means you're functionally the same as a chair located in a completely different room from the testing computer. A perfect score is 50. A score of 20 is supposed to indicate "average intelligence", roughly equating to an IQ of 100. An example question might be "When a rope is selling 20 cents per 2 feet, how many feet can you buy for 30 dollars?" Prospective football players heading into the NFL draft have to take the Wonderlic; the lowest score ever was a 4, by Morris Claiborne in 2012. Your average quarterback gets a 24. Electrical Engineers average a 30 on the test. I scored a 35. The HR person, who has administered this test "thousands of times" said she's never had anybody score that high before.
Then we moved onto the real testing. I was handed six pages of questions regarding medical billing, coding and insurance payments, three books of medical codes, a calculator, a pencil, and told "good luck." The first question was "what is the official name of form used in Example #1?" The second question was "knowing the reason of the visit from the ICD code, was the diagnosis code listed accurate?"
Sure enough, three hours after I walked in I finished the final page of questions. It was actually quite a clever test, assuming what I'm thinking is correct. From where I was sitting, it sure as hell felt like it was testing the subject's ability to reason out difficult problems without guidance, experience in the subject matter, or indeed, any clue what was going on. I guess I did okay; the HR rep didn't grade it with me standing over her... and a damn good thing, too, because I have no idea how I actually did. I'm going to pretend that I didn't outright suck and go with that.
I'm also going to take a nap. That was friggin' exhausting. Holy crepe.
Posted by: GreyDuck at February 21, 2015 12:59 AM (AQ0bN)
3
I used to do something slightly evil when interviewing prospective senior developers - I'd give them a short program to write that couldn't be solved with the information provided.
The goal was to see what questions they'd ask. We'd already seen their resume and knew they could write code. (Actually, that turned out not to be true either, but the test washed those guys out as well.)
If they asked a sensible question, or pointed out that the problem couldn't be solved as stated, they got the second page.
Junior programmers got the same test, but they got both pages.
Posted by: Pixy Misa at February 21, 2015 08:00 AM (2yngH)
4
I'd heard about the Wonderlic, but hadn't seen a breakdown of the scoring... You've got to feel better about your employment prospects and well you should.
Bravo Zulu, amigo. Outstanding.
Posted by: The Old Man at February 21, 2015 09:13 AM (o6+UC)
5
I thought political correctness had driven out tests like that because of "disparate impact", which is why companies started relying on college degrees.
Posted by: muon at February 22, 2015 04:14 AM (XIprt)
6
Which meant that everyone had to have a college degree to get a job, which put pressure on the colleges to give everyone degrees, which made the degrees worthless.
Round and round we go...
Posted by: Pixy Misa at February 23, 2015 05:10 PM (2yngH)
The Greatest AMV Ever. Bar None.
I hear you now, gentle reader: "The greatest AMV ever? That's quite the claim, Wonderduck." To which I reply, "who are you and how did you get in here?"
Nevertheless, I stand by my assertion. Reader haunter103 called my attention to his AMV, entitled "Good Clean Fun", and asked if I had seen it. I had not, so I decided to take a look at it. Here it is...
By the time it was over, there were tears running down my face. Tears of joy, and, surprisingly, tears of pride as well. For there, listed at the end of the credits sequence, is Wonderduck's Pond, specifically the "Ducks In Anime" category.
Thank you, haunter103. Thank you for letting me be a small part of your accomplishment. It's a good video, and I'd think so even if I didn't love rubber ducks. However, the ducks just push it into the "godlike" category.
That was fun as all get-out!
UPDATE: If you've stopped by due to Robert's weekly newsletter, hi, hello and welcome! Hope you enjoy haunter103's video, and while you're here, why not take a look at the rest of The Pond? Since you're probably an anime fan, you might particularly enjoy the "Anime Writeups" category, where I do episode-by-episode recaps of entire series... usually, at least. Currently Kantai Collection is the show under the microscope, but Ga-Rei Zero, Rio Rainbow Gate!, Vividred Operation, High School of the Dead, and others have had the dubious pleasure of being a target. Or, of course, you can cock an eye at the Ducks in Anime category, too, because... well, because ducks, that's why. Or anything else that meets your fancy, too, feel free to look around!
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 19, 2015 02:05 PM (+rSRq)
3
Steven; that depends on how you feel about Ranma.
Posted by: Ben at February 19, 2015 04:33 PM (IlQaj)
4
Awesome video! Fun execution! Nice credits! And they didn't forget to duck!
Posted by: Suburbanbanshee at February 19, 2015 09:50 PM (jGQR+)
5
I will say one thing, AMV's come in all flavors of yum!
Posted by: Bob (aka Robert) at February 20, 2015 09:33 AM (/38s5)
6
For years, we have called my younger sister "Duck" (to her dismay). I thought it was enough to've discovered Princess Tutu's existence, but this...this is rapture. It just keeps unfolding into something truly wondrous!
Posted by: TJF588 at February 20, 2015 03:22 PM (gqgzx)
7
Hey, you didn't mention Ben-to!, which was my favorite writeup (after Rio)!
Posted by: Ben at February 21, 2015 02:13 PM (DRaH+)
8
I was hoping you'd enjoying it. I got the impression you like anime ducks.
Thanks to you for creating a blog that so uniquely served the purposes of my amv. I found you site a little over halfway through completion of it. I was gearing up to start filling out the big chorus scenes with as many ducks I could find, so I googled "anime ducks". I wasn't prepared to find an entire blog dedicated to the subject.
I suddenly had a lot more work to do, but I was glad that my final vid would be more complete in it's duck references. I couldn't not give your blog a special thanks afterwards. Also, these days it's hard for me not to perk up when I see ducks in current anime.
Cheers
-haunter103
Posted by: haunter103 at March 01, 2015 03:22 AM (fOhqD)
9
"it's hard for me not to perk up when I see ducks in current anime."
One of us, one of us...
Posted by: Wonderduck at March 01, 2015 11:59 AM (jGQR+)
Banality, To Steal From Brickmuppet
Fellow blogger and all-around Good Egg Brickmuppet has a category entitled "banality". It's less for stuff of overawing importance and more for life-focused material. For those readers that don't particularly care about the person and just want to free ice cream, he hides the main text "below the fold" and puts a nice picture on the top screen. I'm going to do the same thing right now...
Click "more" for... um... to read the news. Otherwise, enjoy the picture and have a lovely rest of the day.
1
Give it your best shot, amigo, you'll do fine. Looking forward to hearing about the new job.
Posted by: The Old Man at February 19, 2015 06:08 AM (o6+UC)
2
That last picture... I have so many questions...
(Seriously: Good luck!)
Posted by: GreyDuck at February 19, 2015 08:16 AM (AQ0bN)
3
Good luck! I know you can do it, and whatever it is, you'll do it great!
Posted by: Suburbanbanshee at February 19, 2015 09:51 PM (jGQR+)
4
Banshee, you'll have to change your Name when you leave a comment. All I can do is copy, then delete the comment, then repost it... which is not something I'm gonna do that often.
As is, your name has had the e-mail address in it for months.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 19, 2015 09:54 PM (jGQR+)
Ask Wonderduck (almost) Anything! The 2015 Edition
The time has come, once again, to Ask Wonderduck (almost) Anything! In this semi-irregular featurette of The Pond, you the reader get to Ask Wonderduck (almost) Anything!, and I promise to answer to the best of my ability!
There are a couple of restrictions, of course. I won't answer questions involving religion or politics... there are plenty of people out there who cover those topics infinitely better than I ever could, and I created The Pond specifically to be a place without such things. Also, while I'm not opposed to answering personal questions, I withhold the right to tell you to buzz off. Finally, there are many, many things in this world that I am not an expert, talented amateur, or even clueless n00b, regarding. If you ask me a question like "how do I convert my car from using tires to running on tank treads," I'll do my best to answer correctly but I make no promises... no blaming me when you wind up stuffed into the side of a hill, upside down and on fire.
In the past, people have Asked Wonderduck why sloths don't live forever, why domesticated ducks are albinos, and was I planning on watching the Kancolle anime, and many many other things besides. So now it's your turn...
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 17, 2015 01:06 AM (jGQR+)
3
What is your most middle favorite anime. (Most Favorite and Least Favorite questions being lame)
Posted by: Mauser at February 17, 2015 02:46 AM (TJ7ih)
4
Relating to Kancolle ep 6 and it's curry contest, J-list used to sell a Japanese curry mix flavored with apples, Vermont Curry. Would you try that? Also, has the series mentioned the Kaiten suicide torpedo? In game, the shipgirls request that it not be loaded on them.
Posted by: muon at February 17, 2015 04:25 AM (XIprt)
5
Can you give the elevator pitch on why I should look into Hidemari Sketch? It's about to be available for streaming.
Posted by: Tom Tjarks at February 17, 2015 08:17 AM (8TxhX)
6
@4 Muon, sure, I'd give it a shot, particularly if someone decided to send me a box for free. I can imagine it's... interesting.
And no, they've not mentioned kaiten, and I don't expect them to.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 17, 2015 10:29 AM (jGQR+)
7
@5 Tom Tjarks: why I should look into Hidemari Sketch?
If it's going to be streaming (and free), why NOT give it a try? If you're looking for more concrete reasons, it's lighthearted, funny, and nice to its characters. Seriousness does occur every now and again, but it's not SERIOUS serious... a set of lost apartment keys, a torn uniform, that sort of thing.
If you're looking to de-stress after a day, HidaSketch is as good a way as any, and better than most.
And there are ducks.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 17, 2015 10:34 AM (jGQR+)
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 17, 2015 10:35 AM (jGQR+)
9
1) What anime are you following at the moment?
2) You've demonstrated a lot of knowledge about military history, where and when did you learn it?
3) What is your favorite anime duck?
Posted by: Riktol at February 17, 2015 01:49 PM (zDlKl)
10
>"how do I convert my car from using tires to running on tank treads"
Once upon a time you could get this close with a well known aftermarket kit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-9CgOhj0HP0
(Images safe for work. Although I can imagine that in the natural course of this sort of thing, some contestants had to put their pocket change in the cuss jar, the dialogue is pretty much unintelligible over the mechanical clatter in the background.)
More at
http://www.modeltfordsnowmobile.com/lcmainhistoricalimages.htm
including some other cars similarly converted.
Of course, anything you can do to a Model T, you can do better to a Willys Jeep. There was actually some military interest in them, with or without skis in front:
http://www.milweb.net/features/jeep.php
Something more like a proper tank treads / skid steer conversion was commercially available (though supposedly no more than half a dozen people availed themselves of it) and may be seen in action at
http://www.armyjeepsforsale.net/jeep-willys-with-tank-tracks.php
Special bonus points for completing what appears to be the maiden voyage and/or Dad's first lesson in driving the thing without inadvertently modifying of any of the parked vehicles or dogs in the near vicinity. Toward the end a couple of the young'uns go off road and do a few things that... uh, a well handled regular Jeep could have done, but they make much more noise in the process.
And, heck, here goes the rest of the afternoon:
http://www.unusuallocomotion.com/
(Vast amounts of outside-the-box thinking in 35 articulated -- no pun intended and not much of one achieved -- and 3 uncategorizable categories. The moon is there.)
Posted by: Ad absurdum per aspera at February 17, 2015 02:43 PM (470Py)
11
@10 AdAbPerAsp: My uncle, ladies and gentlemen. Yep, it runs in the family.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 17, 2015 04:35 PM (jGQR+)
1) Why, Kantai Collection, of course. You should read the episodic recaps, they're quite good.
2) Like most boys, I got interested in that kinda stuff at a young age. Played my first tabletop wargame (Fight In The Skies!) around the age of nine or ten... against Pond reader Vaucaunson's Duck, in point of fact... and it grew from there. It's some 35+ years later now, and my MilHist library is... um... sizable.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 17, 2015 04:40 PM (jGQR+)
13
"I can imagine [Vermont Curry is]... interesting."
Unfortunately, it's not. Pretty much tastes like other pre-fab Japanese curries. I was expecting some serious apple, but no. Maybe it comes through in the "mild" flavor, but what's the fun in that?
Posted by: Mikeski at February 17, 2015 06:25 PM (lO+tS)
14
@13 Mikeski: Maybe it comes through in the "mild" flavor, but what's the fun in that?
I consider prepackaged "hot" curry to be mild, too. If it doesn't polish your silverware as you eat it, it's not hot enough. (For things that are flavorfully hot. Thai curry? If it's not stocked in the decongestant aisle at Walgreens, it's bad and wrong. Buffalo wings? Mild is fine; the hot ones just taste like pain.)
And I'm supposed to be asking you anything here...
What are your favorite and least-favorite Japanese foods? (Dealer's choice as to whether to limit the answers to typical as-seen-in-anime food or not.)
Posted by: Mikeski at February 18, 2015 12:01 AM (lO+tS)
16
@15 Mikeski: I don't like hot curries. Food shouldn't be painful.
Speaking of food, my favorite Japanese food is a nice tonkatsu. Simple, I admit, but there you are.
Least favorite is anything involving eel or octopus. I am willing to admit the possibility that good food involving either ingredient is possible. I have not experienced such miracles, however.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 18, 2015 12:24 AM (jGQR+)
Respect. I like mine in katsudon more than the "simple" version, but tonkatsu is good stuff.
Posted by: Mikeski at February 18, 2015 12:59 AM (lO+tS)
18
I've made myself many batches of Vermont Curry (hot). It's not hot, and with all the other ingredients, I can't imagine anything like apple or maple is in there.
But it's tasty stuff, if not especially hot.
I recently learned how absurdly easy it is to make fried rice, and last weekend took it to the next level, with Bacon Fried Rice.
It was Goooood!
Posted by: Mauser at February 18, 2015 03:34 AM (TJ7ih)
19
Did you see the curry episode of Rosario + Vampire?
Posted by: muon at February 18, 2015 05:05 AM (XIprt)
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 18, 2015 10:17 AM (jGQR+)
21
I've got Shattered Sword, and it was everything advertised.
I'm well covered for general Pacific theater, general European theater, North Africa, and the Battle of Britain. Anything Eastern Front that you'd recommend?
I've also been trying to fill in holes - I've got good books on WW1, the Korean war, and the Falklands war, but nothing on the two Israeli wars or, for that matter, Vietnam. Any recommendations along those lines?
Posted by: Avatar at February 18, 2015 07:20 PM (zJsIy)
22
@21 Avatar: Antony Beevor's Stalingrad and The Fall of Berlin are good, battle-specific reads on the Eastern Front. As far as a general history goes, though, I can't help ya... my knowledge is limited for that Front.
Along those same lines, I've never been particularly interested in the Vietnam war. I've spent a little time reading up on Chosin during the Korean war, but that's only because one of my professors at Duck U., one of the nicest guys you'd ever want to meet, was a Chosin Marine. But all in all, I'm a WWII in the Pacific guy.
The Falklands interests me, mostly because it was the first conflict that I followed as it happened.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 18, 2015 08:53 PM (jGQR+)
23
Honestly, I'm not terribly interested in Vietnam specifically - but I've been tryin' to fill in the gaps left by a public education, and sometimes I get surprised. I had picked up a couple of histories of India (one pre-, one post-independence) and had a pleasant time brushing up on that aspect. The Falklands book was another purchase along those lines - before I got the book I could just about tell you that there was a place called Falklands and that there had once been some kind of war there, but that was it.
I'll look up Beevor, though. Could definitely enjoy the Stalingrad one. Thanks.
Posted by: Avatar at February 19, 2015 12:30 AM (a38fD)
24Stalingrad is quite good, better I think than Fall of Berlin. Beevor has a German bias, because, quite simply, those are the records he had access to at the time the book was written. Some reviews make note of that as an anti-Soviet bias, that the Sovs just react to German plans.
Of course, nothing is further from the truth, and anybody who has actually read the book will tell you that Beevor doesn't suggest that.
My favorite baseball book, Nine Innings, examines baseball as a whole through the playing of one game in 1982 between the Milwaukee Brewers and the Baltimore Orioles. Some reviewers throw a hissyfit because the author, Daniel Okrent, doesn't do much coverage of the behind-the-scenes aspect with the Orioles. There are two reasons for that: 1) Okrent had friends inside the Milwaukee front office that gave him what was, for the time, unprecedented access to everything involving the Brewers. Then, reason #2), Earl Weaver was the manager of the Orioles. Weaver didn't tell his own players what was going on, he sure as hell wasn't going to tell some random writer anything.
Same sort of thing with Stalingrad. You write what you have.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 19, 2015 01:56 AM (jGQR+)
The Falklands war is interesting for another reason: It's the only time since WWII when a submarine sank an enemy warship "in anger".
ARA General Belgrano was formerly an American Brooklyn-class light cruiser (USS Phoenix) purchased by Argentina. It was sunk by HMS Conqueror on May 2, 1982.
(My info may be out of date; didn't the NK's sink an SK ship with a mini-sub a couple of years ago?)
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 19, 2015 02:02 AM (+rSRq)
26
(My info may be out of date; didn't the NK's sink an SK ship with a mini-sub a couple of years ago?)
For anecdotal reasons (and if you can count higher than potato), yep.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 19, 2015 03:30 AM (jGQR+)
27
Have you seen my AMV? I wanted to thank you, your "ducks in anime" blog
proved to be an invaluable resource to enhancing the overall impact of
how my video turned out.
PSA: Watch Top Gear on BBCA on Monday
If you like Top Gear, but you didn't hoist the black flag for the new episode, I encourage you to make sure to catch it on BBC America on Monday evening. The "Star in a Reasonably Priced Car" segment is, I think, the best they've had since Tom Cruise and Cameron Diaz were on in 2011. I'm not going to mention who the star is, but if you've ever trusted Wonderduck on anything, and god help you if you have, trust me on this. The rest of the episode is kinda meh, but the SiaRPC is great fun.
If you did go all jolly roger on the episode, best not to mention the participants until Monday night, eh?
1
I'm confused - how have you seen tonight's episode already? Does the Anatidae Liberation Front have access to time travel technology?
Posted by: Siergen at February 16, 2015 09:21 AM (ohSuC)
2
It airs on Sunday in the UK, and he, as he says, hoisted the black flag. Arrrr!
Me, I'll be sure to watch it tonight, but then I always do.
Posted by: flatdarkmars at February 16, 2015 09:46 AM (h7xWz)
3
Hmm. I got spoiled on that part somewhere, G+ or Tumblr or Twitter, one of those. I may go ahead and check it out... I haven't watched any of this season yet, which says a lot about how "meh" I've become over the show this past few years.
Posted by: GreyDuck at February 16, 2015 09:48 AM (3m7pZ)
4
What series is this? The last I've seen is 20, I think. Pretty sure I never saw any of 21 which had the Burma trip.
Posted by: Ben at February 16, 2015 09:57 AM (S4UJw)
GD, the show's high-point was S12. That's the one that had the Lorry Driver challenge, the Ford Fiesta test (Blues Brothers-ing through a mall), the Vietnam special, fitting a F1 rear wing to a minivan, the Blackpool Illuminations, V8-powered blenders and rocking chairs, and much more. Ever since then, it's been kinda downhill.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 16, 2015 07:33 PM (jGQR+)
6
I cannot argue your analysis, sir. Because really, everything after the Ford Fiesta test (the amphibious beach landing!) has too high a bar to clear. If you ever have the need to laugh yourself silly at a Serious Car Review, that segment will do it, every time.
Posted by: GreyDuck at February 16, 2015 09:28 PM (AQ0bN)
7
And said review can be found here. (Figured a link was more polite than an embed).
Posted by: Mauser at February 17, 2015 02:57 AM (TJ7ih)
8
About the only parts I've watched for the past few years are the road trips and the cheap car challenges. The storytelling elements are stronger in those segments.
Posted by: Ben at February 17, 2015 12:23 PM (rCGpC)
Best Laid Schemes
The meandering blechs never really improved, and being CREATIVE!!! turned out to be more than I could deal with. Now I'm dealing with the sort of headache that makes one wonder how best to remove one's own head with all due haste.
Maybe tonight there will be creativity. I hope so. I want this project done. If it works, it's gonna be swell!
Schemes And Plans
I'm dealing with a case of the meandering blechs, but I intend to plow through that and do something creative and exciting tonight. After the nap I'm about to take, that is. The "something" is what I've been hinting at for a while that I've just needed motivation for, and tonight, I've decided to make my own motivation. Hooray for artificial ups!
Since I'm not one to leave y'all hangin' with nuthin', here's something else.
Vaucaunson's Duck has just fallen out of his chair. Again. GreyDuck is nodding his head. But then, they've both heard this before. Hopefully you, the neophyte listener, will enjoy this cover of the O'Jays classic "Back Stabbers" by the Last Gentlemen. And if you've heard this version before, make yourself known!
Kantai Collection Ep06
There are moments when I do these Episodic Writeups when, quite honestly, I don't want to take the time or the effort. Sometimes its because I'm too busy doing other things, sometimes it's because I just don't want to... and sometimes it's because the Production Staff made something that is difficult to recap just by its nature. That's the case here, with the new episode of Kantai Collection. Last week saw the creation of a new fleet and Fubuki become its unlikely flagship. This week?
(shaking head)
Let's get this over with.
We open with...
Nagato is brooding over some tough choices she's going to have to make in the coming days, which is her unfortunate duty as Secretary of the Fleet. Yeah, yeah, that's nice... more importantly, Mutsu's back and feels sad that her sister refuses to share the burdens. Truly, Mutsu is wonderful. An episode of her reading a novel and sipping tea would be welcome, Production Staff. Just a thought.
Destroyer Division Six, fresh from a foraging expedition, discovers a sign proclaiming that it's time for the Naval District Curry Contest! The Imperial Japanese Navy, and for that matter its successor the Japanese Maritime Self-Defense Force, had a long-time relationship with curry, dating back all the way to the Anglo-Japanese Alliance in and around 1902. Indeed, every Friday was (and is) curry day in the ships of the fleet. In this case, the contest-winning curry will be the recipe used for the next year. Well, hell, sounds like a plan to the DesDiv6 girls! They quickly decide that they'll enter the contest. It'll be a cinch!
Except that British-born Kongo is going to enter her special spicy English-style curry. Oh yeah, other people are going to enter, aren't they? CURRY FIGHT-O! Look, I like me some curry, but not super-spicy. We've had this conversation before. Give me a mild curry, not one that'll punch my teeth in just for eating it.
Definitely don't give me Ashigara's "wild hardcore ultra-spicy curry." Why anybody would want to inflict that sort of damage on themselves is entirely beyond me, but I know they're out there. I also know there are people who don't like lima beans, which to me makes no sense: they're totally innocuous, it's like not liking plain rice. It may not be all that tasty, but it's not going to be offensive. And how can people dislike grilled cheese sandwiches? It boggles the mind, but there are people out there who don't like grilled cheese sandwiches. I'm not talking about grilled cheese with stuff on it, like tomatoes or mushrooms or ham or whatever, I'm talking about a simple, plain grilled cheese sandwich. With a bowl of tomato soup. How can you not like that? It is a puzzlement. Don't get me wrong... I digs me some ham & cheese melts like a LeTourneau L2350 loads trucks, but not when I'm wanting a grilled cheese sandwich.
1
The Sankaku Complex comment on the episode was that this fanservice episode was sure to be a welcome respite from the hardcore action and drama that the series was garnering a reputation for.
Someone is smoking the spicy curry.
Posted by: Ben at February 12, 2015 11:13 PM (DRaH+)
2
That's the bay leaves. Well, some kind of leaf...
As far as the close-up of eating goes, this season's Koufuku Graffiti is essentially a show that's about nothing but generating those moments. Seriously, the entire animation budget is used up in those parts as girls stuff delicious foods into their mouths. (not really - the show doesn't look bad exactly, but the show does kind of go into an extremely-detailed over-bright "are you aroused yet?" mode for those scenes...)
Otherwise pretty light slice of pie, er, life.
Yeah, this ep of Kancolle was plain forgettable. Though I did laugh at Shimakaze's boil-in-a-bag curry entry...
Posted by: Avatar at February 13, 2015 01:10 AM (ZeBdf)
3
Mmmm, looking at that first picture of Mutsu... Nice Hull.
As for Curry, how about some Little Prince goes to New York Curry, it's supposed to be mild.
Posted by: Mauser at February 13, 2015 07:07 AM (TJ7ih)
4
Best possible version of the Gendo pic, there. It's SO TRUE.
An episode where you're required to have meta knowledge to get half the jokes. Le sigh. Le double sigh.
Posted by: GreyDuck at February 14, 2015 01:27 AM (AQ0bN)
5
Have there been any references to the Kaiten suicide torpedo? In game, the shipgirls request not to be equipped with them.
Posted by: muon at February 16, 2015 06:26 AM (XIprt)
First Of His Kind
So, yeah, I'm dead. Mostly. Kinda. Pretty much. It's not entirely easy to explain, but its not like I'm going anywhere soon, so I'll give it a shot.
I died on some battlefield somewhere. I'm not entirely sure I ever actually knew where we were, even when I was alive. Being in the sort of state I'm in tends to mess with the memories some. That whole "dead" thing, y'know? Anyway, yeah, battlefield. We'd been advancing pretty steadily all day, like the bad guys weren't going to fight for the place. Would have been a smart move, actually. From where I was standing, all that the place had to offer anymore was craters and dirt. Still, there we were, so there must have been something worthwhile. That's what I tell myself, anyway.
It wasn't until the artillery started to fall that we had any evidence the bad guys were even still around. We weren't letting our guards down or anything; most of us had been around the block a few times already, and those that hadn't followed our lead. When the first rounds screamed down, most of us ended up in craters of varying sizes. Lucky me, I was in the only stretch of land around without a shellhole handy. You can dig awfully fast when you need to, though, and soon enough I had cover.
Which was exactly what they wanted us to do, of course. Didn't take long before I heard what sounded like a million bees heading towards me, followed by some confused orders. One voice, sounded like the LT, said to get up and counterattack. Another said to fall back... that one sounded like God Himself, which meant it was Sarge. He wasn't trying to do it, it's just the way his voice rumbled. Not that we'd laugh about it around him but hearing him in the mess hall, asking for another dish of pudding, was the most amazing thing ever. Some of the unit did one thing, some did the other. Me? I somehow managed to split the difference, slowly moving to the rear while firing steadily and calling in a contact report to the intel weenies.
Sure enough, the "million bees" were fantanks. The official name is a lot longer, but we just called them fantanks. Hovercraft that can go anywhere, and can do it fast. Good guns, too, just not a lot of armor. They swept in, volley fired, then scooted away before we could really respond. If that wasn't enough, the arty came back, this time with rockets mixed in for good measure. Through my helmet link, I saw the names of my squadmates flashing red or going out altogether, and I had just a moment to swear before the bees came back and suddenly there was a hole in me big enough to throw a small dog through.
The powered suit we wore was a marvelous piece of equipment. Armored against most light arms, impressive mobility, boosted strength, environmental protection, and a built-in trauma center to boot. If you had an arm blown off at the elbow, it'd snip the damage off, seal the wound to keep you from bleeding to death, pump you full of happypills, and call for pickup, all of it almost before you knew you'd been hurt. Bullet hole from some armor piercing round? Seal-and-heal man, seal-and-heal. But what can it do when a round the size of a can of soup punches a through-and-through just below the ribs? It didn't hurt anywhere near as bad as I thought something like that would, probably because the round took my spinal column with it.
Bless the creators of the suit, though: it tried. It pumped the hole full of the sealing foam, so it looked like I had banana cream pie embedded in my torso. It shot an entire pharmacy's worth of drugs into me, and even as I blacked out it was calling for my emergency pickup. As it turns out, my contact report saved me. Well, no, but you know what I mean. The officers behind the line saw that the bad guys were trying to break out through our position and moved to reinforce us even before I was hit. A couple of minutes after I went down, suit screaming for pickup, I was in the hands of the medics and the bad guys were on the run.
Posted by: GreyDuck at February 11, 2015 08:11 AM (AQ0bN)
4
An OGRE/GEV story! Very nice!
Good on the AI's going insane; biologics think too slow...they need their own kind before they could ever choose to reach out to us.
And they hate being called "AI's."
Posted by: Clayton Barnett at February 11, 2015 04:14 PM (sNyCw)
5
Clayton, thank you for the compliment, much appreciated.
But why do you think you know how AIs work in my universe?
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 11, 2015 08:19 PM (jGQR+)
Because my friend Ai told me! <insert intolerably cute grin while making peace signs on each side of her face>
And they hate that term, no matter who's universe. (kidding!) Imagine calling someone born via IVF an "artificial human."
I really want to read more of this; I made a GEV story a million years ago as a 14-year old. It sucked, but stuck with me.
I've even a take on this for my 'Steampunk Reilly' graphic novel series, where the Kingdom of Prussia attacks Bavaria with difference-engine controlled TROLs (Tracked Remotely Operated Landships).
Is this going to be commercial? I certainly hope so.
Posted by: Clayton Barnett at February 11, 2015 08:38 PM (lU4ZJ)
7Is this going to be commercial? I certainly hope so.
We'll see.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 11, 2015 10:12 PM (jGQR+)
1
I completely don't understand what's going on in that picture. The ship has broken in half and the bow section is capsizing, while the island and stern remain upright? Why aren't the planes sliding off into the water?
Geoffrey Broke's Alarm Starboard (fantastic book) has a v. scary account of a being on a destroyer that nearly capsized in the north Atlantic.
Posted by: AlanL at February 11, 2015 12:12 AM (MgVWN)
2
Yours is the same reaction the picture got when I posted it elsewhere... and, in fact, mine when I first saw it.
Would it help if I said there are actually two carriers in this picture?
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 11, 2015 01:42 AM (jGQR+)
3
... And the island of the front one is under the water or has fallen off?
Posted by: AlanL at February 11, 2015 02:23 AM (UGO4c)
4
I couldn't get my mind wrapped around the perspective until this morning. The brain just isn't prepared for a situation in which a flight deck appears to form a square.
Posted by: Ben at February 12, 2015 09:19 AM (S4UJw)
Random Anime Picture #93: Deadly Dutch Elm
-Ga-Rei Zero, Ep06
For the past couple of months, if not longer, I've been s-l-o-w-l-y working on a project for The Pond. One that probably won't be worth the amount of time, to be honest, but one I should be enjoying. Hell, it's the sort of thing that, in the past, I've loved doing! As it's turned out, it's proven to be a royal pain in the asterisk. Still, this is one of those things that I literally do NOT have the option to drop. I acquired all the materials for this back when I was too busy to do anything with it... now that I've all the time in the world? I don't have the drive to deal with the minor annoyances that have popped up along the way.
On the other hand, I've enjoyed rewatching Ga-Rei Zero recently. So wonderfully dark, spiked with light-hearted stretches that just emphasizes how damn evil it can be. I'm just on edge of turning my Top Four into a Top Five, just so I can give it the credit it deserves. And there is Pocky and laser weasels too, so it's got that going for it. Which is nice. Doesn't really help with the project, mind you, but there you go.
Kantai Collection Ep05
Another week, another episode of Kantai Collection for our enjoyment! The important question, of course, is how can they top Ep04's weirdness and Mutsu-service? Will we get the fabled episode of Mutsu doing nothing in particular? Will there be plot development? Or will there be silly? Come, my friends, let us venture forth into Episode 05!
What? A headquarters shot without Mutsu? Booooooooo! Undoubtedly she's outside, enjoying a pleasant walk along the harborside while kittens and unicorns frolic nearby. Oh, and Nagato has just told Torpedo Squadron Three that they're being dissolved immediately. To the acid baths with you! She goes on to say that they'll be reassigned to other fleets... oh. Wrong type of dissolve. I have to admit, this annoys me as he who doth scribe these writeups to no end... they're breaking The Fellowship! Frodo (F-for-Fubuki), Merry (M-for-Mutsuki) and Pippin (P-for-poi) will be no more. Now I might actually have to be creative, and nobody really wants that, do they? Nuh-uh, not if you're smart you don't.
The hobbits have one last moment together as they pack up their troubles in their old kitbags and smile, smile, smile. Frodo, as is her wont, is doing the whole "they're breaking up the fleet and its all my fault" thing, and Merry is being all "oh for the luvvapete, the Admiral is just reorganizing, you moistened bint," and Pippin is like "whatever, just get me out of here, you never liked me anyway." And she's got a point, that "poi" thing got out of hand fast. Still, Fubuki is getting all sad and stuff until it's pointed out that she might be put into the same fleet as Akagi.
I cannot tell you the amount of inappropriate thoughts going through Frodo's head at this moment. Pippin has the right of it, however, when she says that Fubuki's kinda creepy. Lights out finds all three destroyers unable to sleep, and a walk along the wharf in the moonlight ensues. They turn out not to be alone.
The coven complete, they ritually sacrifice a light carrier and use her blood to draw arcane symbols upon the ground. Quiet chanting can be heard for throughout the base, drawing many fleetgirls to their windows in mixed consternation and horror. "Iä Hastur cf'ayak'vulgtmm, vugtlagln vulgtmm. Iä Hastur cf'ayak'vulgtmm, vugtlagln vulgtmm." The blood is mixed with two egg yolks, half a teaspoon of pepper, half a teaspoon of chopped green onion, some flour, then mixed with mashed potatoes. The resulting glob is divided, shaped into circles, dipped in beaten egg and rolled through sifted breadcrumbs, then fried in peanut oil until a golden brown. Makes up to 10 croquettes and summons Hastur, the Unspeakable One, Him Who Is Not To Be Named. As opposed to Fernando Alonso, HWMNBN.
As the moon turns red in the sky, yet reflects normal light, gasps of fear and the slamming shut of windows can be heard. And coming from somewhere unseen, the plaintive voice of a young child can be heard like a dirge: "Hey, mister... can I have my ball back?" As the surface of the water begins to roil and froth, we shall mercifully draw a veil over what occurs next between The Fellowship and Hastur, and skip ahead to...
Posted by: Mauser at February 07, 2015 06:07 AM (TJ7ih)
2
*This* episode has you saying "this doesn't make sense", while *I* am saying, "this is more like what I expected." Weird.
I really liked this one. It was the first episode that didn't really have a single thing that took me out of the story, and as a whole it flowed nicely. I guess the one real complaint would be that they didn't show enough of the battle, but it's pretty clear that Kantai Collection is meant to be about fleet construction and the personalities of the fleet girls.
Or at least it is in *this* episode. In the next episode I wouldn't be surprised if they establish a forward base that is later attacked by Abyssals that results in the loss of several not-appearing-in-this-anime battleships.
And this all goes back to the point I was making the other day: are the writers doing this on purpose, or is this just pure laziness? Nothing, from a writing perspective, has been brilliant, but they handled the unifying plot device as well as could be done.
Posted by: Ben at February 07, 2015 01:48 PM (DRaH+)
3
The only part of the episode that didn't make sense was the fleet composition. Three high-value targets and two rare torpedo cruisers with more potential shipkilling ability than any dreadnought screened by a single destroyer? Bah.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 07, 2015 08:43 PM (jGQR+)
4
Yeah, but I don't expect them to get "screening" right in a show like this anyway...
Posted by: Avatar at February 07, 2015 08:59 PM (ZeBdf)
I thought towel-animal-tying was a cruise ship thing. What's a military vessel doing tying them?
Posted by: Mikeski at February 08, 2015 02:40 AM (lO+tS)
8
Maybe she learned it from Yamato? (grin, duck, run very fast)
Posted by: Avatar at February 08, 2015 05:23 AM (ZeBdf)
9
Oooooh, clever deep knowledge reference from Avatar! I award him five geek cred points.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 08, 2015 09:31 AM (jGQR+)
10
Ia-ftaghn aside, I managed to both like and dislike this episode. There are plenty of funny bits and Frodo gets to actually be good at something for a change. On the flipside, her competence level (for that matter, everybody's competence level) seems to be dictated by the need of the plot-like substance in the show. "We need her to be rescued, so have her fall down and freak out a lot. Okay, now we need everyone to respect her, so have her devise a workable strategy and convince these other crazy ships to go along with it."
Sort of how a particular sinking in a previous episode pretty much came down to, "She did good and professional work, then stood around futzing with her hair, so down she goes." Meh.
It's amusing enough to keep watching but I'll forget all about it once it's over, I suspect.
Posted by: GreyDuck at February 08, 2015 04:31 PM (AQ0bN)
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I have to return those geek cred points, as I heard it in the context of Kancolle. (So hey, maybe it is educational!)
Posted by: Avatar at February 08, 2015 09:09 PM (ZeBdf)
F1 Pr0n: 2015 MegaPr0n
Amazingly, while I've been off being disinterested in pretty much everything the world of Formula 1 hasn't slowed down one whit. The first round of pre-season testing at Jerez is almost finished, and that's swell. We've gotten to hear the new Honda engine, which is cool as heck, but the first test session is often spent working out the kinks and trying to keep the cars running on track.
Unless you're Mercedes this year, who seem to be so confident that they spent a few hours on Tuesday running on Intermediates to see how long they'll last on a dry track. This while McLaren was happy to average less than 10 laps per day in their revamped car.
But the really big thing about the first round of tests is that we finally get to see the new cars... and that's what we call F1 Pr0n around these-here parts! Shall we take a look?
1
Clearly Red Bull has adopted dazzle camouflage to make torpedo attacks on their cars more difficult.
Posted by: flatdarkmars at February 05, 2015 07:37 AM (h7xWz)
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There's really no way to get around the fact that the front wing is a big flat box with a lot of crap in it, is there? Is that something which happened over some number of years or has it always been more-or-less like that?
Posted by: GreyDuck at February 05, 2015 08:27 AM (AQ0bN)
So from a single-celled thing to the complex peacock of today, in 50 years. Of course this doesn't include so many others... so so many others.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 05, 2015 01:31 PM (jGQR+)
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@flatdarkmars, Torpedo attacks are allowed in F1 racing? I may have to take time to watch them this year...
Posted by: Siergen at February 05, 2015 04:54 PM (/CwtH)
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No torpedoes, but railguns are permitted under this year's rules.
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 05, 2015 09:03 PM (+rSRq)
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However, they have to be powered by KERS. That way they can't fire very often.
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 06, 2015 03:27 PM (+rSRq)
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All kidding aside: Thanks for that retrospective on F1 design, there. In a weird sort of way, that makes the current front-wing situation make a lot more sense.
Posted by: GreyDuck at February 07, 2015 10:30 PM (AQ0bN)
ARIA the Avvenire!
News leaked out today that we're going to get to travel back to Neo-Venezia!
Click for larger
The website above was taken down nearly as quickly as it went up. It seems to be announcing, in relation to the 10-year anniversary of the first series, a new BD boxset and, most importantly, a new series (or OVA?), ARIA the Avvenire. If true, you can't imagine how thrilled I am. The general consensus is that it is absolutely legit. The scenery porn from a modern ARIA should be tremendous.
We've never had an ARIA show released in true HD quality. The final season came out in 2008, when such things weren't common in the least... however, HAL Filmmaker is gone, merged with another company to form TYO, which has done the square-root of nothing since, so a different production house will probably have to do it.
There are two obvious questions involved here. The first is what the series/OVA will cover. The existing shows didn't cover the entire manga, but they did get most of it, and what's left over may not be enough for a series. It couldn't be new stuff from Kozue Amano, maybe focusing on Ai... could it? The director for the previous series, Jun Sato, will also get the nod for this, which is fitting, right, and pretty much required.
The second question is what to do about Athena? Both of her voices have passed away, Eri Kawai (Athena's singing voice) in late 2008 and Tomoko Kawakami (her speaking voice) in 2011. They couldn't just write her out of the story. Well, they could, but... no, I don't think anybody could accept that, including the anime staff themselves.
Getting ahead of myself. Deep breaths. Calm. Center. In with the good air, out with the bad...
IIRC, at the end of the series the three young girls all graduate, and the three older girls all retire. Isn't that right?
If so, and if they placed the OVA after that, they might plausibly disinclude the three older ones and thus avoid the voice problem.
More likely, though, is they'll find someone else to do the voice. There's precedent for that.
One is Fuyuki in Keroro Gunsou, who was also voiced by Tomoko Kawakami. Houko Kuwashima took over for her starting with episode 232 because Kawakami was too sick to continue.
Another is Sakamoto in Strike Witches. When time came to do the second series, the original seiyuu was pregnant and didn't want to take on the job, so they found someone else to do the part thereafter.
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 03, 2015 07:08 PM (+rSRq)
2At the end of the series the three young girls all graduate, and the three older girls all retire. Isn't that right?
Alas, no. Alicia has retired from Aria Company to work for the Gondola Association. Athena is now an opera singer. But Akira is now The Prima Undine.
I'm not saying they can't write her out... there's plenty of ways to do it... I just want my new ARIA to be just like my old ARIA, just better! And I can't see how new ARIA can be better without Athena singing.
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 03, 2015 10:05 PM (jGQR+)
I'd seen the same rumor on ANN; God willing, it's true. Listening again to Kin no Nami Sen no Nami right now... it never fails to move me.
As I coined years ago: "When I die, if I come to in Neo-Venezia, I'm in Heaven; if I see the town of Glie, I'm in Purgatory; and if I see Lain, I'm in Hell."
Posted by: Clayton Barnett at February 04, 2015 08:14 PM (lU4ZJ)
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Y'know the question, "If you could live in any anime, which one would it be?"
ARIA and Neo-Venezia. There is no other I would be remotely interested in. I might be okay with visiting a couple, but...
Posted by: Wonderduck at February 04, 2015 09:47 PM (jGQR+)
Talk about this made me recall. There's something I'd like to give you, via Amazon, but it requires an email address. I'd like to assume that by having me enter my email in the "make a comment" you've access to mine, but one never knows.
If you'd like to have my gift, an e-copy of my new novel (and yes, there's an Aria reference in it!), please let me know via writer @at@ 3-arstudios dot com (he said trying to fool the bots, with a posed look).
Posted by: Clayton Barnett at February 05, 2015 08:54 PM (lU4ZJ)
Yes, that's the group that provided music A number of people in the Kuricorder Quartet were part of the group that provided music for Azumanga Daioh. Performing John Williams' Imperial March. I suck.
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I don't think they did Azumanga Daioh. They did the music for Pythagoras Switch.
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at February 02, 2015 07:03 PM (+rSRq)
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AD was Kuricorder Pops Orchestra with Oranges and Lemons. However, I think some of the same musicians were involved. I can't find verification, though.
Posted by: Ben at February 02, 2015 07:32 PM (dLr9j)
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By coincidence, I listened to the Kuricorder Quartet for a while earlier this evening, including the "Imperial March." The CD is buried in a box somewhere so I can't check, but as I recall, the "Kuricorder Pops Orchestra" is the Kuricorder Quartet plus a few extra musicians. Besides Azumanga Daioh, they also recorded a couple of very listenable albums inspired by Yotsuba&!
Posted by: Don at February 02, 2015 08:39 PM (Rr4UF)