Some months ago, I decided that I was going to do writeups for each of the new Evangelion movies, collectively called "The Rebuild of Evangelion".  This had the horrible timing of being at a time when my life suddenly got ridiculously busy, to the point where it took over seven months to complete the first movie's writeups.  At the end of the last writeup, I even expressed some doubt over whether or not I'd even attempt the second movie.

I have only abandoned one writeup series.  This will not become the second.  It's too ripe for my kind of writeup, I just can't let it pass unhindered.  So I promise to do this movie, and faster than seven months.  Deal?  Deal.  So let's get right to it!  The first movie was pretty much a shot-for-shot retelling of the first six or so episodes from the original TV show, though with a graphics upgrade and slightly less whiny Shinji... will the second film follow the same pattern?

That would be a big "nope."  Right off the bat, we're dropped into a scene that didn't exist in the show, with a new, unnamed pilot.  Stranger, much of it is in English, though stiff and stilted.  Eh, must be British.  Weird to see Japanese subtitles in an anime... anyway, this is the "troublemaker" pilot of Eva-05, which appears to be some sort of test unit.  There's an Angel attack under way, and this is, apparently, the first run of the unit.  Clearly, this will go nothing but well.

Oh, him we've seen before, though.  His name is Kaji, and he's some sort of double-triple agent spy for one faction or other... SEELE, NERV, S.H.I.E.L.D., ASPCA, whatever.  He showed up in the TV series to give Misato someone to sleep with, and who was then promptly shot.  Here, though, he appears to be present in some sort of advisory position to the... Russian?... Eva base.  As it turns out, the attacking Angel isn't a real Angel, it's the animated bones of the dead Third Angel, the one that caused the Second Impact fifteen years ago, and we're in Antarctica, where the Second Impact occurred.  None of this is explained, nor even inferred by the movie... I had to look it up.  Good storytelling, Evangelion!.  Kaji bugs out, and we return to...

It appears the Third Angel was a duck.  Well, yeah.  We still haven't had a clear look at the new Eva unit, though it appears to have wheels instead of legs.  A short fight ensues, the Duck Angel nearly defeats Eva-05, but at the last moment the Angel is defeated as the Eva self-destructs.

So that's it for the new Eva, the new pilot, and it all goes boom in a pink cloud.  Seems like something of a waste, don'tcha think?  All that excitement over a new character, and she's gone *boop* just like that!

Or, y'know, not.  Here she is, glasses and everything.  It's not like Gainax isn't trying to hit all the fetishes the TV show missed or anything.  Still don't know her name, though... or even that we'll see her again.  She IS floating in an ejected entry plug in a sea of Angel blood near what was Antarctica, after all.  Oh, and the nearest base was just wiped out, too.  Yup, gonna be a long time until she sees rescue.

Time to pause and refresh before we get into the real film!  Go ahead, I'll still be here.  I don't mind. 

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Posted by: Wonderduck at 10:25 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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Tuesday is the first day of Spring classes at Duck U, which means the Duck U Bookstore is going to be crazy-go-nuts for the next few days.  Pity us, we few, for we will suffer the deluge.

Or something like that, at least.

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Soon.

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Feh.

Feh.

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Some many, many years ago, I spent a few days in Stillwater, MN.  Ph.Duck's older brother and his family lived there, and I was a guest in their home while Ph.Duck and Momzerduck did... something I don't remember now, perhaps attend a wedding.  Something like that.  Anyway, being a college kid, I didn't want to just hang out at their (really nice!) house, I wanted to find something fun to do.  Hard to do without a car in Stillwater, but not impossible. 

After descending the Thousand Stairs Of Doom, I found myself in the Historic Downtown District.  To my left was quaint shops, some attractive looking bar & grills, that sort of thing.  To my right was the riverside area.  I headed to one of the bars... it was a sunny early afternoon and warm, so the dark and air conditioning was welcome.  The place, and I will never forget this as long as I live, was called "Cat Ballou's" and had what looked like a life-sized wood-carved statue of Jane Fonda from the movie of the same name near the door.  I was pretty much the only person in the place that early in the day... I remember the cheeseburger and fries being tasty, and the beer quite pleasant indeed. 

After a couple of hours working on my version of The Great American Novel, I headed back out to the riverside area.  Yup, it's a river.  Oh look, boats.  Pretty girl in a sundress.  More boats.  Still a river.  What the hell is that?

At the time, I had no idea there was such a thing as a lift bridge.  Drawbridge, sure.  Truss bridge, uh-huh.  Suspension, cable-stay, arch and cantilever bridges, you bet.  But a lift bridge?!?!  What sort of magic is this?  I was fascinated!  As it turns out, it was stuck in the up position at the time, due to all the equipment being original to when it was built and it sometimes does that, but I didn't care at all.  How lovely it was to see such a thing.

I'm sure the traffic that had to detour some ridiculous distance to get across the St Croix river disagreed with my assessment, but that's beside the point.  It was the neatest thing I saw during that visit to Minnesota.  It's still there, though you have to make an appointment with the State to open it for your boat, but it's still there.

Then came the climb back up the Thousand Stairs of Doom.  The climb up was a lot worse than going down, and I changed my plans for the next day so to avoid them.  I haven't seen the bridge since.

I still think it's magic, and I can't honestly see a reason to build one over a drawbridge, but it's still awfully cool.

Posted by: Wonderduck at 09:13 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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I appear to have lost the ability to make something that can go to space.  I can't understand why.  Even the successful Mun Launcher I fails to reach orbit.  I'm surely just doing something wrong, but I'll be darned if I can figure out what it is.

It's frustrating, but also exciting... once I figure out my problem, it'll be all "clear skies and hot jets!"

Or maybe I should say "if".  If I figure out my problem.

Posted by: Wonderduck at 08:10 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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Holy crepe, that's a good film.

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After the failure of Mun Rescuer I, it was time to go back to the design phase to come up with something less likely to turn itself into a brightly glowing ball of incandescent gas.  An hour or so of tinkering brought forth the cleverly named Mun Rescuer II: This Time It's Personal. 

This time with more lights!  No, they do nothing for purposes of getting to the Mun, but it does make it look purty-ish!  The media beast must be fed, don'tchaknow?  It heads into space on the immense power of four Mainsail liquid fueled engines.

See?  It leaps off the pad with the greatest of ease, and practically wants to scream into space at a speed guaranteed to rend it into component atoms before the gravity turn.  It wasn't until Mun Rescuer II: This Time It's Personal dropped the Orange Cans of Fuel that I realized that there was a problem.  Namely, this beast was horrendously underpowered to go to the Mun.  The stage that I had intended to use for Translunar Injection was swallowed just getting into a stable orbit.

Worse still, the lander-and-go-home stage clearly didn't have enough gas get to the Mun on it's own.  Chalking it down as a good test flight, I deorbited, hoping the PPD-12 Cupola could handle the re-entry stress.  Really, the whole endeavor would come down to that... it's pointless if we pick up Bill Kerbin from the Mun, only to fricassee him a few kilometers from home.

Much to my surprise, it didn't turn into something resembling a melted marshmallow... the Cupola really isn't meant for that sort of thing.  Even better, the capsule didn't pull apart from the lifeboat when the parachutes opened up.  Huzzah!  Feh.

So!  A spectacularly frustrating first flight.  Everything worked perfectly... except for the whole reason this thing exists: getting to the Mun and back.  That part?  Not so much.  But at least Bill Kerman is having fun on the Mun.

Morale is still high, despite all reason.

Posted by: Wonderduck at 10:18 PM | Comments (6) | Add Comment
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Here, inside, at Pond Central, it's a comfortable 70 degrees.  Outside the confines of Pond Central, however, it is -18°F, with a windchill of -45°F!  There is a 115 degree difference between inside and outside right the heck now... and it's just short of noon.

It's not the coldest I've experienced, as I lived in Minnesota for two years, but this is easily the coldest I've seen here in Duckford.  A couple of hours ago, I stepped outside just for a few seconds.  That was a terrible mistake.  Fortunately, Duck U is closed for the day, and even better, they announced it early Sunday afternoon!

Holy crepe, it's cold.

UPDATE: It's cold enough that Duck U has shut down for another day already!  We're closed on Tuesday... just what this lil' duck needed!

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So there I was, working on the design of Mun Rescuer II, listening to the playoff game between the Chargers and the Bengals on the radio.  They're in a time-out, and Ian Eagle and Trent Green, one of the better NFL pairings on "network" radio, are talking about what had just occurred on the field.  In the background, the Bengals stadium entertainment system is playing some music that... I've heard before.  It's a simple guitar four-chord progression with a bit of fuzz overtop.  It stops before anything more than that plays, practically nothing to identify it with, but I know this song. 

Except I don't.  You could hold a gun to my head and say you're going to pull the trigger and scatter my brains over a 1" x 1" area if I don't tell you the title right now, and you'd best have a kleenex handy to wipe up the mess.  I've heard it before.  I know I like the tune.  I just can't place it, nor where I know it from.  I begin to fret over the name... or even just how the song goes... or even where I've heard it fore.  ANYTHING I can use to place it.  TEN FRIGGIN' MINUTES later, I shut down Kerbal Space Program, throw on some warm clothes, and head out to the gas station for a bottle of grape juice and a 12-pack of Sprite before the arctic vortex hits and the temperature get flushed down the sewer.  Of course, the entire way there, I'm trying to figure out the tune.  It isn't until I'm back in the car after obtaining my liquid bounty that something dredges out of my memory: "the rock."  Then the certain knowledge that it was used in an AMV from years ago.  Suddenly, the mile-long drive home from the gas station feels like a hundred miles... I need to search for this!

I hop onto yootoob, punch in "the rock AMV", and start scrolling through the list... and there it was.  Sure as heck, that's it... it's a lousy copy, so I search for a better one, but that's the song!  I'm practically dancing in my chair in celebration as I load it up.  Ladies and Gentlemen, I present to you the song that I heard about five seconds of: Apollo Four Forty's "Stop The Rock"!

Now, back to rescue missions!

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After the truly Kerbal Space Program-level success of my Mun landing, it was time to go rescue the first Kerbal on the Mun.  Which meant, of course, designing a new Mun-ship!

Presenting the cleverly-named "Mun Rescuer I".  It didn't take very long to come up with the design, since it's simply Mun Launcher I with a PPD-1 Hitchhiker Storage Container ("The HSC was an invention of necessity - how do we store 4 Kerbals on-orbit without any real provisions for return? Who needed this remains a mystery, as do his motives.") stuck under the Mk1 capsule, more fuel cans and six landing struts.  No way this baby's gonna break off the nuclear rocket, nuh-uh!

In retrospect, I probably should have spent a little more time on the design phase.


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After hours upon hours of poorly thought out mission parameters, unsuccessful orbital routines and rapid unplanned disassemblies...

...I have finally figured out how to to routinely make it into orbit.  As Robert Heinlein pointed out, "once you're in orbit, you're halfway to anywhere."  So, like any good Kerbalnaut, I set my sights on My First Mun Landing®.  How hard could it be?

Here is the trusty steed, the cleverly named "Mun Launcher I", in the middle of the gravity turn for orbit, a short time before dropping the heavy boosters.  Players of the game might recognize that I'm actually heading towards a retrograde orbit... what can I say?  I'm an iconoclast!  I've also had four consecutive successful Munar orbit launches this way, and zero successful Munar orbit launches going the normal way.  It's probably just me.

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1 For my birthday (the 31st) I went legit and bought the full version.  So many parts! I found the Wiki, which is very helpful so far (I didn't know how to set up the staging).

I once made Munar orbit with the demo, 7 stage rocket, I think I even made it home.

Learning to make good use of those Maneuver markers is next on the agenda. It would probably ruin the game if they made them autopilot points.

I do wish there were a little more on-screen documentation/Controls, instead of bringing back the days of needing a keyboard cheat sheet for each stage of the game.

Posted by: Mauser at January 01, 2014 11:56 PM (TJ7ih)

2 (Just testing, don't mind me...)

Posted by: Pixy Misa at January 02, 2014 08:09 AM (PiXy!)

3 Nicely done with the Mun landing, by the way.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at January 02, 2014 08:10 AM (PiXy!)

4 Oh, and speaking of a Keyboard cheat sheet...

Posted by: Mauser at January 02, 2014 09:07 AM (TJ7ih)

5 Bill Kerman, we salute you!  We honor you!  And now, we have to rescue you.  But that's for another day!

He seems awfully happy for someone who's stranded on the Mun. How much time do you have for a rescue before he runs out of oxygen?

Posted by: Peter the Not-so-Great at January 02, 2014 10:12 AM (0KEH0)

6 As long as it takes, basically.  They're pretty hardy little critters.

Posted by: Pixy Misa at January 02, 2014 10:21 AM (PiXy!)

7 Hooray for a successful Mun shot!

Posted by: GreyDuck at January 02, 2014 11:17 AM (3m7pZ)

8 Nicely done!  A Mun landing in true Kerbal style.
After your original post got me back into the game, I've been running in career mode.  It's a LOT harder to get to the Mun when you have a limited set of parts, but it's also a great learning process.  The rocket that got me to the Mun and back was quite a bit bigger and more complex than yours, but I didn't have the big fuel tanks, fuel cross-feed, or nuclear engines available.  It turns out that Minmus is actually an easier target, that same rocket and lander did that as well for their next mission, and was able to do a few orbits of the Mun on it's way back for more research.
My latest goal was to get a probe out to Duna.  I finally managed it last night after redesigning my rocket about 5 times.  The rocket that finally did it was scarily huge, and even so I wasn't lifting a return vehicle, my lander didn't have the juice to get back to Duna orbit from the surface.

Posted by: David at January 02, 2014 11:30 AM (vtKcn)

9 My Mun lander had a central "400" tank with a pair of "200" tanks on the side with the 909 engines on them, fuel feed from the center tank to the exterior ones.  Put on four of the very simplest small solar panels, radial parachutes on top of the side tanks and the pod, an extra battery or two, and an SAS on the central tank just above the decoupler, and you've got a lander that can easily handle itself from Munar injection through several Munar landings and a return to Kerbin.
You've gone way overboard on the struts, especially if you've got all the parts available and are using medium or heavy connectors.  For tanks below 800, I connect them to the central body with one light strut at top and bottom, and connect them to their neighbor likewise with one strut at top and bottom, and that's plenty strong enough to hold things together without any flex.  For the big 3200 tanks, a similar pattern of medium connectors is good enough.  If your lander or transfer stage get big enough, you might tie them to the lower stages with struts out to the boosters to keep things from flexing.
I don't see much in the way of control on that ship.  For something that size, I'd have winglets on the external tanks, and a large SAS at the top of the central tank, backed up with RCS rockets if I'm going further than the Mun and need precise trajectory control.  RCS is also good for landers, as in a pinch it's extra thrust if you run the main tanks dry.

Posted by: David at January 02, 2014 11:44 AM (vtKcn)

10 If that's a nuclear rocket, I think your astronaut has a more immediate problem to worry about than running out of air.  A NERVA type booster becomes intensely radioactive during use, and he's standing a couple of feet from the business end of the thing....

Posted by: Ed Hering at January 02, 2014 05:42 PM (aEOAA)

11 David sez: You've gone way overboard on the struts, especially if you've got all the parts available and are using medium or heavy connectors.

The first version of Mun Launcher I only had one strut to each, and one from each to the body of the command unit.  In perfect KSP fashion, they fell off on launch... and fell onto the "GetMeUpHigh" stage.  In perfect KSP fashion, it all went Boom.  So... OVERSTRUT!

David sez more: I don't see much in the way of control on that ship.

Don't need much.  There's an Inline Advanced Stabilizer up there under the Decoupler attached to the Mk1 capsule.  Further, there's only need for one maneuver for this puppy: the gravity turn.  If the "GetMeUpHigh" stage needs to do anything more than that, well, "You are not going to space today."  The rest of it is handled quite nicely by the IAS... in real life, I suspect the rotations/second this thing can do would kill a person.

Posted by: Wonderduck at January 02, 2014 07:09 PM (Izt1u)

12 Ed sez: If that's a nuclear rocket, I think your astronaut has a more immediate problem to worry about.

Yes, but at least he'll stay warm.

Posted by: Wonderduck at January 02, 2014 07:11 PM (Izt1u)

13 Those barrel things look horribly non-aerodynamic. Gad.

Posted by: Steven Den Beste at January 03, 2014 01:35 AM (+rSRq)

14 Yeah, the aerodynamic drag model of KSP leaves much to be desired.  It used to be that each part had a drag factor, but it basically just boiled down to more parts and more mass = more drag, so adding aerodynamic nose cones and payload shrouds was actually a bad thing.  I heard that they patched it a bit in the latest version, but I need to verify that.

Posted by: David at January 03, 2014 03:06 AM (da+4f)

15 I've been inspired by the Wonderduck, and have decided to blog my own KSP adventure.
These are the stories of the Royal Squirrel Patrol Space Force.

Posted by: David at January 03, 2014 03:07 AM (da+4f)

16 Steven, those "barrel things" are the fuel tanks for the Munar Stage.  And yes, in real life, they'd be as aerodynamic as a cement truck.  But, as David points out, there isn't really a drag model in KSP... yet.  Near as I can tell, every piece of equipment, from a narrow strut to a sideways mounted Orange Can Of Fuel, has the same drag.

Every fiber of my being wanted to put a nosecone on them, believe me.

Posted by: Wonderduck at January 03, 2014 07:16 PM (Izt1u)

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Well, that year sucked awfully hard.

To all the readers of The Pond who bailed, I don't blame you. 

To all the readers of The Pond, old and new, who stuck with the place despite it all, thank you.  You're all great, and I'm lucky to have you.  I hope to be able to tell you just what all has caused this soon, but for now, thanks.

Here's looking forwards to a great 2014, one and all.

Posted by: Wonderduck at 07:31 PM | Comments (7) | Add Comment
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1 Eh, deleting the bookmark was too much work. :-)

Posted by: Mauser at December 31, 2013 11:05 PM (TJ7ih)

2 Meh, i'll just keep lurking. Although keep up the ships thing, thats a bonus.

Posted by: Carpe Jugulum at January 01, 2014 02:08 AM (aTw4s)

3 We'll always have Rio.

-j

Posted by: J Greely at January 01, 2014 09:42 AM (+cEg2)

4 Heck, I'm more or less new here, so who did I replace, and are they smarter than me?

Posted by: topmaker at January 01, 2014 11:51 AM (2yZsg)

5 That which doesn't kill you makes you ornerier!

It's been a hard year, but we're still here. We win.

Posted by: Suburbanbanshee at January 01, 2014 02:01 PM (cvXSV)

6 Man, tell me about it.  I've said repeatedly that this year can go straight to hell.

Which is probably where it came from.

Happy New Year, Wonderduck!

Posted by: Ben at January 01, 2014 03:12 PM (vwNc1)

7 We survived 2013.

We shall hold 2014 to a higher standard.

Posted by: GreyDuck at January 01, 2014 05:51 PM (CUkqs)

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Sad and troubling news from the world of Formula 1 today as recently-retired and seven-time world champion Michael Schumacher is currently in a medically-induced coma and is "fighting for his life."

Schumacher was skiing off-trail in the French Alps with his teenage son when he went down and slammed his head into a rock.  He was taken to a local hospital where initial reports were that he had suffered a concussion.  Doctors recognized something more serious than that, as he could not respond to questions and his limbs moved involuntarily.  He was quickly sent to University Hospital in Grenoble.  Once there, his condition quickly deteriorated, and surgery was required to lower intercranial pressures.  Postoperative scans showed that he had "bilateral diffuse hemorrhagic lesions" on the brain.

He was put into a medical coma to make recovery easier, as well as being kept in a cooled state.  His medical staff has publicly said that they have no idea "what the outcome will be yet.  All we can do is wait."  His family is at his bedside, and he's being monitored closely.  The frightening thought is that brain injuries often get worse after hours or days; the case of Natasha Richardson is a chilling example.

Unsurprisingly, the F1 world and beyond is rallying to his support.  Former President Bill Clinton, with whom Schumacher has worked on The Clinton Foundation, chimed in with good wishes, as have pretty much the entire F1 grid, most if not all the teams, ex-drivers... you name it, they've probably said something.  I think the best one that I've seen has to have been the one from Sauber, for whom he raced sportscars in 1991:

Hard to argue with that.  It's no secret that Schumacher wasn't F1U!'s favorite driver, but today, we'll call him "Slappy" affectionately: Good luck, Slappy, we're all pulling you.

Posted by: Wonderduck at 07:33 PM | Comments (2) | Add Comment
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I can do this.  I can finish this movie writeup by the end of the year.  I will.  It's been nearly four months since the last installment, and in all that time Shinji's face has been unpunched.  This can not be allowed to stand!  But then again, at the end of the last installment, he was being boiled alive inside Unit-01, so he may not be around much longer.  On the one hand, that means our last best chance for survival has just been killed, but on the other hand, it's Shinji.  The world might be a better place without his whiny arse.  Well, we won't know what's going on until we get into it, so let's just do this thing!

Okay, sure, he needed cardiac massage in the Entry Plug.  Okay, sure, everybody is running around frantically rattling off medical terms, none of which sound good at all.  Okay, sure, they put him in something that looks like a carbon fiber coffin and lock the lid.  Actually, I'm pretty sure they just did that because they wanted to.  I mean, wouldn't you???  Back up at the surface...

The latest Angel is apparently part duck.  If you don't understand the reference, count yourself very, very lucky.  If you do understand the reference... *brofist*.  Except, ew, what's wrong with you?  Anyway, it's digging its way down to NERV HQ, and ain't nothin' they've got 'bout to stop it, knowwhatI'msayin'?  They've got about 10 hours before it reaches HQ, Unit-01 needs serious repairs, Unit-00 (with Teh Rei) needs to be "recalibrated" before it can be activated.  Looks pretty grim, until Misato mentions something about the Japanese Self-Defense Force's "secret weapon" and activates Operation Yashima.

Within ONE HOUR, heavy equipment from around the country has been gathered around Tokyo-III and is beginning to do... heavy equipment-type things.  Huge cranes.  Giant earth-movers.  Triangular helicopters carrying stuff.  Men putting things on top of other things.  Industry!  Science and technology!  Something is mentioned about a "Positronic Cannon", which sounds cool.  After a couple more hours, things are coming together: Unit-01 is being fitted with a "sniping system," power cables are being run to Tokyo-III from all across Japan, and everything is a "go" at Midnight.  All that's needed is a pilot for Unit-01, but he's dead, right?

Dammit!

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Now that Matt Smith's four year run as The Doctor has come to an end, I'm going to do something bonecrushingly stupid... I'm going to state a preference for one recent Doctor over another.

To whit: I think Matt Smith was a more successful Doctor than David Tennant.  This is not to say that Tennant wasn't good in the role; he clearly was.  After the disastrous run of Christopher Eccleston's PTSD Doctor¹, Tennant could have sunk the franchise completely.  He didn't, however, and without his years as the time-traveler, Doctor Who would not... could not... be as huge as it currently is.

In a broad sense, the success of Tennant's run is based on amazing episodes.  Take away "Waters of Mars," the Christmas specials (particularly 2007's "Voyage of the Damned", aka "the one with Kylie Minogue"), "Silence in the Library" (aka "the first one with River Song"), the wonderful "School Reunion", and my favorite of the bunch "The Girl in the Fireplace", and some others that I can't be bothered to look up right now, and you've got a rather lackluster overall picture.

Smith, Tennant's successor in the role of the Last Time Lord, brought more energy and humor to The Doctor.  His success is undoubtedly based on the entire run of episodes, as opposed to individual ones.  That's not to say there weren't excellent episodes; there surely were.  "Vincent and The Doctor," "The Doctor's Wife", and "Asylum of the Daleks" immediately come to mind.  However, Smith's Doctor is almost a throwback to the original serial version of Doctor Who.  While each episode is a standalone or half of a two-part, they all fit into the overarching storyline for the season, whatever that might be.

In any case, I believe that if you choose an episode at random of Doctor 10, and one at random of 11, you are more likely to see a very good one with #11. 

Smith also had the better "supporting cast" with him as well.  Amy & Rory were his companions for two-and-a-half seasons, and while they probably should have moved on earlier than that, they were clearly superior to anything Tennant had with him... though Rose was no slouch.  It may be personal bias that believes that makes me think that Clara will be better than either A&R or Rose.

So, yes, I find that Matt Smith is the best of the recent Doctors, and probably ranks just below Tom Baker in my mind in the Great List of Doctors.  The comment area is below... let the Flame War commence!

¹ I will admit that the more I've watched his one season, the more I've come to appreciate what he brought to the role.

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I'm tired, I'm either sad or maudlin, I'm annoyed, and I had to work today.  I'm going to take a nap then go to sleep.

Thank you, everybody.

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Not nearly as good as the image I had in my mind.  Oh well.  I wish I could have done the 12 Days of Duckmas this year, but there was just no time.

A happy and joyous Christmas to you and yours from all of us here at The Pond!

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It's Christmas Eve.  For the past few weeks, the only music I've been able to play at the Duck U Bookstore has been... you guessed it... Christmas music.  I am not ashamed to say that I'd rather gut myself like a fish than do that.  Which means it's time for a special CHRISTMAS EVE TUNAGE with DJ Wonderduck!!!

There won't be ANY Christmas music in this one, oh no!  Just great rockin' good times in an attempt to crush the holiday music out of my brain.  Let's not wait, let's just do this!  TUNAGE!!!

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Last night, I sat down to create a post detailing the outcome of a fight between an Yamato-class battleship of the Imperial Japanese Navy and an Iowa-class battleship from the US Navy.  Hardly new ground, this, but it would have been a first for The Pond.  Except there was a teeny tiny little problem.


After doing research, racking my brain, and a lot of staring at the ceiling, I simply could not come up with a way that the Yamato had a legitimate chance to win, short of stupidly restrictive rules.  Limiting the area of combat to 20 miles or whatever, for example.  Without doing that, there just doesn't seem to be a way that the Iowa could lose, save for luck.

The Japanese ship's main (only?) advantage is her 18.1" guns' longer range.  The Type 94 had a range of 26 miles, while the American 16"/50 Mk 7 could throw a shell (essentially) 24 miles.  Penetration ability for the two was found to be roughly the same.  But at all ranges, the US gun was more accurate.

So unless the Yamato could put an unlikely round on target in that two mile stretch where the Iowa couldn't respond, almost everything pointed toward the technically smaller ship's advantage.  She was faster by at least six knots, her armor layout was better, the fire control was much better, even the secondary battery would better.  Other than sheer size and an amazing amount of built-in buoyancy (a Yamato-class ship was designed to have every compartment outside of her armored box area ["A" turret to "X" turret"] flooded and still float), the Japanese ship had one other thing going her way: the only impenetrable armor ever put to sea.

The armor on the front of the three main gun turrets on the Yamato was 26" thick, sloped at 45°.  In US Navy testing after the war, this armor could be penetrated only when an Iowa's gun was placed at 0° inclination to the armor plate, and at a range of zero yards... in other words, a completely unrealistic situation in battle.  In any likely combat situation, there was no way to punch through the armor on the front of a Yamato's main turret.

So, one advantage, I suppose, but not one to hang a battle on.  The only way the chances of victory for the Japanese begins to become realistic is if they can close the range, so to counteract the huge fire control advantage the American ship has.  If that happened, then you're looking at a coinflip, maybe even a Japanese advantage as their superior weight of broadside plummets down.  But with their six knot speed advantage, the Americans can decide the range and keep it there.

So, good idea for a post, but it kinda doesn't work.  It happens.  A better battle might be Yamato vs South Dakota, since a SoDak is, for all intents and purposes, a slower Iowa.  Maybe in the future.

Posted by: Wonderduck at 10:17 AM | Comments (19) | Add Comment
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