October 19, 2015
And I Laughed And Laughed And Laughed...
So here's the situation. I'm at work... actually, I'm in the breakroom, refilling my water bottle with water and fresh cold ice (best benefit of the job: the icemaker), and I notice one of the really new hires (I'm no longer a total noob!) reading a paperback. The cover is emblazoned with the words...
...which of course made me smile. While I'm pretty much over Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, et al, I'll always remember them fondly. I must have chuckled or something like that, for the kid reading looked up at me, and was that perhaps a look of annoyance that flashed across his face? Oh no, not another vunderkinde who thinks his generation invented everything cool. Yup... "Is something funny?"
"Yep! The cover of your book... seems to fit this place perfectly."
"It's not really like that. The book is called The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, and..."
"Yes, I know!"
"You saw the movie, huh?"
Oh. Oh dear. I've had this sort of thing happen to me before, and ever since that time in 2008, I've wondered why. Do I look like I'm so incredibly uncool that I wouldn't watch anime, or read science fiction or manga, or even seen Dr Horrible's Sing-Along Blog? I've even had someone express surprise that I've played Fallout 3. Is it because I'm old? What? What is it? "Yes, I saw the movie. Quite enjoyed it, actually, particularly the dolphins, and Zaphod's two heads effect was...". At this point, I was going to say "...much better than the old TV show's", but the kid got all kinds of snippy then.
"The movie is awful, you should read the book." Now look, the movie isn't going to win any awards, that's for sure, but short of having the ghost of Douglas Adams make his way back to this plane of existence and take a few classes in movie directing it wasn't likely to be any better than it was. I mean, other than the Heart of Gold looking completely wrong, there's very little to complain about visually. Heck, some bits of it were quite inspired: Mos Def as Ford Prefect? Alan Rickman and Stephen Fry as Marvin and The Book? Zooey Deschanel playing Trillian like the character was written for her? But where does he come off suggesting I've never read the book?
At this point, I probably should have nodded, said "good idea," and walked away. If I had been in a better mood, I probably would have. But I'm still in an awful mood, so I didn't. "My hardcover copy is probably older than you are. I have a British paperback first edition of The Restaurant at the End of the Universe. I once had a small group of friends over to my house when I was a freshman in high school, just to listen to the radio play on NPR... on 8-Track! But you're right, I should read it. Again. It's been a few years." And I walked away, humming "So long and thanks for all the fish."
I then cranked out 40 claims in an hour, followed by another 39 the next, on the way to my best day yet: 245 claims in eight hours. Maybe I can get the kid to piss me off every day?
...which of course made me smile. While I'm pretty much over Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, et al, I'll always remember them fondly. I must have chuckled or something like that, for the kid reading looked up at me, and was that perhaps a look of annoyance that flashed across his face? Oh no, not another vunderkinde who thinks his generation invented everything cool. Yup... "Is something funny?"
"Yep! The cover of your book... seems to fit this place perfectly."
"It's not really like that. The book is called The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, and..."
"Yes, I know!"
"You saw the movie, huh?"
Oh. Oh dear. I've had this sort of thing happen to me before, and ever since that time in 2008, I've wondered why. Do I look like I'm so incredibly uncool that I wouldn't watch anime, or read science fiction or manga, or even seen Dr Horrible's Sing-Along Blog? I've even had someone express surprise that I've played Fallout 3. Is it because I'm old? What? What is it? "Yes, I saw the movie. Quite enjoyed it, actually, particularly the dolphins, and Zaphod's two heads effect was...". At this point, I was going to say "...much better than the old TV show's", but the kid got all kinds of snippy then.
"The movie is awful, you should read the book." Now look, the movie isn't going to win any awards, that's for sure, but short of having the ghost of Douglas Adams make his way back to this plane of existence and take a few classes in movie directing it wasn't likely to be any better than it was. I mean, other than the Heart of Gold looking completely wrong, there's very little to complain about visually. Heck, some bits of it were quite inspired: Mos Def as Ford Prefect? Alan Rickman and Stephen Fry as Marvin and The Book? Zooey Deschanel playing Trillian like the character was written for her? But where does he come off suggesting I've never read the book?
At this point, I probably should have nodded, said "good idea," and walked away. If I had been in a better mood, I probably would have. But I'm still in an awful mood, so I didn't. "My hardcover copy is probably older than you are. I have a British paperback first edition of The Restaurant at the End of the Universe. I once had a small group of friends over to my house when I was a freshman in high school, just to listen to the radio play on NPR... on 8-Track! But you're right, I should read it. Again. It's been a few years." And I walked away, humming "So long and thanks for all the fish."
I then cranked out 40 claims in an hour, followed by another 39 the next, on the way to my best day yet: 245 claims in eight hours. Maybe I can get the kid to piss me off every day?
Posted by: Wonderduck at
09:05 PM
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1
And of course, you've played the Infocom computer game, right? Which ran on DOS? And you figured out how to get a Babel Fish?
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at October 19, 2015 09:28 PM (+rSRq)
2
I did play the game, but I never got the Babel Fish. I hated text games... too damn hard.
Posted by: Wonderduck at October 19, 2015 09:33 PM (a12rG)
3
I agree with the 'Duck - I never had a lot of luck with them. (Leather Goddesses of Phobos, anyone?) But if you remember, Steven, please help my C64 to rest in peace by telling me how you got it. TYVM.
Posted by: The Old Man at October 20, 2015 07:25 AM (duGaw)
4
I never solved that problem, either, so I found a solution online. I recall that it was extremely elaborate, requiring something like 12 steps.
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at October 20, 2015 09:37 AM (+rSRq)
5
I got the babel fish, if I remember correctly. I gave up doing all the bits from the Heart of Gold. Took me months to even get that far. Some of the game was intuitive if you had read the books, but a lot of it was do-it-again-(from the beginning)-stupid.
Part of hipster-ism is an adoption of older technologies and traditions. So I guess fogey-ism is now just a branch of hipster-ism.
You hipster.
Part of hipster-ism is an adoption of older technologies and traditions. So I guess fogey-ism is now just a branch of hipster-ism.
You hipster.
Posted by: Ben at October 20, 2015 11:19 AM (DRaH+)
Posted by: Doug O. at October 20, 2015 11:32 AM (sdWdc)
7
I got stuck at the Babel Fish, too.
Also: All we can hope is that this kid grows up and, some day, realizes what a snotty little tool he used to be, back in the mid-'10s...
Also: All we can hope is that this kid grows up and, some day, realizes what a snotty little tool he used to be, back in the mid-'10s...
Posted by: GreyDuck at October 20, 2015 02:19 PM (3m7pZ)
8
Does he now approach you by inching his way up the corridor, when he'd rather be yarding back down it?
ps: Your captcha has no sense of humour. It asked what color is an orange, and I quite sensibly responded blue.
ps: Your captcha has no sense of humour. It asked what color is an orange, and I quite sensibly responded blue.
Posted by: dkallen99 at October 23, 2015 12:32 PM (c/F3T)
9
dk, the captcha is is entirely Pixy's purvey... I didn't even realize it existed until you said something.
Posted by: Wonderduck at October 23, 2015 06:21 PM (a12rG)
10
After years of fighting spammers and trying (and failing) to use various kinds of AI to distinguish the spammers from real people, in Desperation (Desperation, NSW, a major industrial complex in Australia) Pixy decided to try a captcha. So far it's been a major success even though it doesn't rotate.
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at October 23, 2015 06:32 PM (+rSRq)
11
Let me rephrase: I knew it existed, because I saw it over at your place, Steven, when it was first installed, and I haven't seen it since. What I didn't know was that it was HERE at The Pond...
Posted by: Wonderduck at October 23, 2015 07:38 PM (a12rG)
12
That Infocom game has to be one of the best things I've ever played. IMNSHO it actually out-funnied THHG itself.
Awwright, let's see if I remember the babel fish sequence correctly. You push the button and the babel fish flies through a small hole in the wall beneath a hook. So you hang your robe on the hook and push the button again. The babel fish then falls down a drain in the floor beneath the hook. So you put your towel(?) on top of the drain to catch the fish. Push the button and the fish hits the robe, falls on the towel and is scooped up by a cleaning robot that pops out of an access panel in the wall and disappears behind another(?) access panel. So you lay your satchel on the access panel to stop the robot from absconding with your fish. Push the button again and the fish hits the robe, falls on the towel, is picked up by the robot which plows into the satchel, sending the fish flying into the air...
where it's plucked away by another cleaning robot that evidently exists to keep random things from occupying the air. So you try putting something on the satchel and do it all again, but the second cleaning robot somehow manages to snatch both whatever you placed on the satchel and the babel fish at the same time.
So you've consistently run out of fish trying various different strategies, put everything you can think of on the satchel, been dumped out the airlock $DIETY-knows how many times and you realize you must have missed something important. So you start the game over, hang your robe on the hook, place the towel on the drain, place the satchel on the access panel and then place the loose pile of junk mail that you completely overlooked (because junk mail) on the satchel and press the button. The fish flies out of the machine, hits the robe, falls onto the towel where it's picked up by the cleaning robot which then plows into the satchel, sending the fish flying and creating a large cloud of junk mail in the air. The second robot flies out if its access panel and begins madly gathering the junk mail while the babel fish continues sailing through the air in a graceful arc which terminates when it lands directly in your ear with a satisfying squish.
You are now free to enjoy the Vogon poetry, thereby encouraging the captain to read you a <b>second</b> verse of the poetry before tossing you out of the airlock, which turns out to have been enough time to be picked up by the Heart of Gold before dying of exposure to space with a full .1 second to spare.
And lemme tell ya: the babel fish was a doozie, but Marvin the robot's screening door was worse, much further in the game and yes, it also required a restart for a problem that you'd have been extremely hard-pressed to see coming. All hail Douglas Adams!
Awwright, let's see if I remember the babel fish sequence correctly. You push the button and the babel fish flies through a small hole in the wall beneath a hook. So you hang your robe on the hook and push the button again. The babel fish then falls down a drain in the floor beneath the hook. So you put your towel(?) on top of the drain to catch the fish. Push the button and the fish hits the robe, falls on the towel and is scooped up by a cleaning robot that pops out of an access panel in the wall and disappears behind another(?) access panel. So you lay your satchel on the access panel to stop the robot from absconding with your fish. Push the button again and the fish hits the robe, falls on the towel, is picked up by the robot which plows into the satchel, sending the fish flying into the air...
where it's plucked away by another cleaning robot that evidently exists to keep random things from occupying the air. So you try putting something on the satchel and do it all again, but the second cleaning robot somehow manages to snatch both whatever you placed on the satchel and the babel fish at the same time.
So you've consistently run out of fish trying various different strategies, put everything you can think of on the satchel, been dumped out the airlock $DIETY-knows how many times and you realize you must have missed something important. So you start the game over, hang your robe on the hook, place the towel on the drain, place the satchel on the access panel and then place the loose pile of junk mail that you completely overlooked (because junk mail) on the satchel and press the button. The fish flies out of the machine, hits the robe, falls onto the towel where it's picked up by the cleaning robot which then plows into the satchel, sending the fish flying and creating a large cloud of junk mail in the air. The second robot flies out if its access panel and begins madly gathering the junk mail while the babel fish continues sailing through the air in a graceful arc which terminates when it lands directly in your ear with a satisfying squish.
You are now free to enjoy the Vogon poetry, thereby encouraging the captain to read you a <b>second</b> verse of the poetry before tossing you out of the airlock, which turns out to have been enough time to be picked up by the Heart of Gold before dying of exposure to space with a full .1 second to spare.
And lemme tell ya: the babel fish was a doozie, but Marvin the robot's screening door was worse, much further in the game and yes, it also required a restart for a problem that you'd have been extremely hard-pressed to see coming. All hail Douglas Adams!
Posted by: HayZeus at October 30, 2015 11:43 AM (ADdY5)
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