May 27, 2007
*ZING WENT THE STRINGS...: ...but YAWN went the F1 UPDATE! crew. Monte Carlo always has the ability to turn into a snoozefest, but this one was particularly bad. How bad?
We fell asleep on the F1 UPDATE! couch.
*SEE CHAMELEON, LYING THERE IN THE SUN. ALL THINGS TO EVERYONE...: McLaren completely dominated the race, sprinting away at the lights. By the time the carnage was over, they had a one minute, five second lead over Felipe Massa in third.
A lap of the course only takes one minute, 15 seconds. Chew on that for a minute... and you STILL won't have caught up with the McLarens.
(note: bonus points to the first reader to tell us what song the headline is from)
*DRIVER OF THE RACE: American Scott Speed. There's been a Scott Speed sighting! Started 18th, finished 9th, and stayed on Kimi Raikkonen's Ferrari the entire race. Terrible result for Raikkonen, great for Speed.
*TEAM OF THE RACE: McLaren. They didn't short-fuel, gambling on rain. They came up with the perfect setup for Monte Carlo and just completely dominated the race... and they say they've got still MORE speed in hand. If so, this season is over, so complete was the thrashing.
*MOVE OF THE RACE: There was no passing to be seen today. The MotR will go to Fernando Alonso for being able to get his car off the line when the lights go green. By the end of the first lap, he had 1.75 seconds in hand and the race was over.
Yeah, it was that bad.
*MOOOOOOOO-OOVE OF THE RACE: There were no stunning examples of bad driving, so we give the Mooooo-oove to Team Spyker, just because.
*SELECTED DRIVER QUOTES OF THE RACE: "I won F1's biggest race, and I'm tied for first in the Driver's Championship. Life is good." - Fernando Alonso.
"I came in second in F1's biggest race, and I'm tied for first in the Driver's Championship in my rookie season. I'm rich, handsome, single, and I'm in Monaco. Life is very good." - Lewis Hamilton.
At this point, the F1 Update! crew packed up and went home. Like the race, the interviews were putting us to sleep.
We never thought we at F1 Update! would say this, considering how much we appreciate the history of the Grand Prix of Monaco, but the FIA needs to do something. This wasn't a race, it was a tech demo.
Montreal is next on the agenda, and at least THAT race is built for speed and passing... and it'll be on FOX, to boot, so we get to see if they do anything with the graphics. See you then!
Posted by: Wonderduck at
02:01 PM
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Post contains 460 words, total size 3 kb.
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at May 27, 2007 02:12 PM (+rSRq)
When Hamilton slammed the door on Massa at the start, preventing him from getting anywhere NEAR Alonso, the race was over. The only question was would either McLaren do anything stupid, and the answer was no.
Posted by: Wonderduck at May 27, 2007 02:20 PM (2nDll)
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at May 27, 2007 02:25 PM (+rSRq)
I don't think that's it, though. It's probably a combination of lots of little things: a tiny tweak here, a little change there... those things add up. Renault, for example, had a pretty good weekend, and if you had told me that two races ago, I would have laughed because they were SO bad.
There's one other thing that it could be. It's Monaco, and no other race is like Monaco. This dominating performance could be a blip, a statistical anomaly. If I was a betting duck, I'd put my money on this reason.
Posted by: Wonderduck at May 27, 2007 02:32 PM (2nDll)
Posted by: Pete Zaitcev at May 27, 2007 03:23 PM (9imyF)
Posted by: Pete Zaitcev at May 27, 2007 03:29 PM (9imyF)
Posted by: Wonderduck at May 27, 2007 03:31 PM (2nDll)
Australia: 2, 3
Malaysia: 1, 2
Bahrain: 2, 5
Spain: 2, 3
Monaco: 1, 2
And that's with one of the drivers a rookie.
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at May 27, 2007 05:48 PM (+rSRq)
They're fast and they're not breaking, unlike the past few years when they had the most fragile car on the grid. At times it seemed like you could sneeze and the wheels would fly off the McLaren.
Basically, that's the difference between now and last year.
Posted by: Wonderduck at May 27, 2007 05:53 PM (h/YdH)
Posted by: Steven Den Beste at May 27, 2007 07:31 PM (+rSRq)
Posted by: Mallory at May 28, 2007 05:11 AM (iLcnv)
My dad heard that Slade song coming from MTV once when I was a teen - and has been whistling it ever since.
Posted by: Vaucanson's duck at May 29, 2007 05:17 AM (oplPK)
Posted by: Wonderduck at May 29, 2007 11:25 AM (2nDll)
Posted by: Dave at May 29, 2007 01:37 PM (Vre2j)
It's good to see, however, that SOME of my readers were awake in the '80s!
Posted by: Wonderduck at May 29, 2007 02:55 PM (A5s0y)
I used to work with a guy who drank with Slade when they were at college. Reckoned they were some of the hardest men in Birmingham, not to be messed with. To be fair, I would never mess with a chap in a mirrored top hat.
Posted by: flotsky at May 30, 2007 07:24 PM (6T2ID)
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