November 26, 2017
F1 Update!: Abu Dhabi 2017, The Season's Over Edition
So with that, the 2017 season drives off into the sunset... literally, considering the sun went down during the course of the race today. The championships had been sewn up for weeks. It was theoretically possible for Mercedes' Valterri Bottas to take 2nd in the Driver's Championship, but he'd have to win and Ferrari's Seb Vettel would have to finish... um... 9th or below, it looks like. Half of the staff of F1Update! called in today, too busy spending the holiday weekend with family or friends or both. So it was a depleted crew that gathered in the F1U! Media Center And Snack Bar as the F1 Circus waited for the lights to go out. What sort of show did we see? THIS is your F1 Update! for the 2017 Grand Prix of Abu Dhabi!
*LIGHTS OUT: We're changing our mind. We're not going to do bullet points tonight. The conversation, it flows through us. Because whooo-boy, this was a big race full o' nuthin'. Right from the start, Bottas took the lead from teammate/world champion Lewis Hamilton and would essentially not relinquish it for the rest of the day. However, almost immediately we here in the F1U! Media Center And Pizza Joint became incredibly suspicious. Hamilton didn't exactly attack the first turn the way he normally does... not that Bottas gave him much in the way of opportunity to do so.
And thus it came to pass that when the first lap ended, the top 12 cars on the starting grid... were still in the same position they started in. This did not come without some tomfoolery, though, as Nico Hulkenberg's Renault had been passed by the Force India of Sergio Perez. Hulkenberg, aware that the drab and boring Top 12 thing was resting fully on his shoulders, decided to take the place back by the simple expedient of ignoring Turn 12 altogether. He would eventually be given a five second time penalty, which he served during his only pitstop. It made no difference however, as he was able to open enough of a gap on Perez to come out ahead on the whole thing. Makes us here at the F1U! Media Center And Ball Pit wonder when someone is going to do it intentionally and win a race by doing so...
Anyway. Bottas and Hamilton began to open a lead on Vettel in third, while Bottas stayed around two seconds, give or take, ahead of his teammate. It is true that Yas Marina Circuit is difficult to pass at, but we suspect that if there had been anything to gain, Hamilton would have been giving it a bit more effort. Kind of like this writeup, come to that. When the two Mercs made their respective pitstops, Hamilton tried... he put in some quick times in the laps between Bottas' stop and his own, and the stop itself was faster than the Finn's... but it was to no avail. It was going to take a Safety Car situation to close them up. There were two opportunities for Berndt Maylander to wake from his eternal slumber and make an appearance. The first was when Red Bull's Smiley Ricciardo was told to retire the car due to a hydraulics failure. He found the biggest patch of grass in Dubai and nearly managed to roll it behind the wall for the track workers. The second time was later in the race when Renault let Carlos Sainz leave the pits without ever actually tightening the left-front wheel nut. Yup, the gunner never bothered. While this sounds like something that would happen at the F1U! Media Center And Lube Rack, it probably shouldn't during a F1 race. Just saying, y'know?
As the laps ticked down, the race settled into the processional we here at the F1U! Media Center And Parade Organizational Facility had expected all along. Late it looked like we could possibly have some action when Bottas locked up a wheel. That allowed Hamilton to close into possible attack range, but the Finn was able to fend off the World Champ easily enough. After this, it was clear that the Brit said "okay, you win". From spending the entire race within two seconds or so, he was suddenly four seconds back. And that's the way it stayed, the two Mercs finishing 1-2, with the Ferrari of Seb Vettel a distant 15 seconds behind Hamilton. After that, it was nearly a half-minute of waiting before the other Ferrari of Kimi Raikkonen crossed the line, Embryo Verstappen nipping at his diffuser as he did. There was then another wait of 40 seconds before Hulkenberg finished.
After the race, the two Mercedes drivers pulled onto the pit straight and proceeded to do donuts for the crowd, with the World Champion showing that one skill he doesn't have is doing donuts in a F1 car. Here's Bottas, carving perfect circles of rubber onto the track surface as befits the android he is, then there's Hamilton, flooping around like he's hooked up to a spirograph. We here at the F1U! Media Center And Etch-A-Sketch Art Gallery could only roll our eyes and groan. Which we then did, loudly and with feeling, when the Williams of Felipe Massa slowly edged its way into the picture. Yes, we know it's your last race, Felipe. No, we don't care, you had your moment in Brazil. The staff of the F1U! Media Center and Etiquette Facility tut-tutted savagely. We figure he thought he'd be the only one out there and by the time he realized the Mercs were, y'know, celebrating their season-long accomplishments, it was too late to turn back to the pits. Even Massa's long-time chief mechanic, Rob Smedley, asked "are you sure you're supposed to be there?" No, Rob, he wasn't. Thanks for asking, though.
In the end, the only change this race presented was Renault passing Toro Rosso for sixth in the Constructor's Championship. That went Mercedes, Ferrari, Red Bull, Force India, Williams, Renault, Toro Rosso, Haas, McLaren, and Sauber disappointingly brought up the rear. With a whimper, the 2017 Season came to a close, leaving the members of the F1U! Media Center and Prognostication Division to wonder: "wither the sport?" Things need to be fixed, from penalties for parts changes to constant domination by one team or another. Perhaps Liberty Media can pull it off, perhaps they can't. We'll find out in 118 days, in Melbourne. See ya then!
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November 25, 2017
F1 Quals: Abu Dhabi 2017
I'm a little pressed for time, but I didn't want to leave y'all hanging! Here's the provisional grid for the 2017 Grand Prix of Abu Dhabi:
Different graphical format today... the usual grid layout isn't copying correctly, and Firefoxy doesn't work today for some reason. So instead you get a picture! Sorry... just imagine the nicknames, 'k?
Yup, Bottas is a full half-second ahead of the third place sitting Seb Vettel. As predicted, the weather was perfect for the Silver cars, and thus one of the Mercs was fastest in all three phases of Quals. It was Bottas that was the fastest when it mattered, though, setting a new track record in the process. Unsurprisingly, Hamilton is now saying that he hopes we don't "have a train" in the race... I suspect he'd be saying "yes, please, choo-choo" if he was on pole, though.
So we're all set for the 2017 finale, tomorrow morning is looming soon. We'll see ya then, then!
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November 23, 2017
Post-Turkey 2017
Hey everybody! Did y'all have a happy Thanksgiving? Or, for those members of the Pond Scum that aren't in the US, did you have a good Thursday? Mine was... actually not so bad at all. I'm not going to the Old Home Pond for The Meal until Saturday, so I got to do something I've wanted to do for a long, long time: I watched football on Thanksgiving.
That I had no rooting interest in any of the six teams that played today is of no importance at all. In fact, that made it better in that I didn't care about the results, so could just watch and enjoy. I watched the entirety of the Vikings/Lions game, listened to the Chargers/Cowboys which wow was awful, and gave up on the Giants/Redskins somewhere in the second quarter and took a nap. Not a bad day at all, that.
What about you folks?
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November 22, 2017
F1 on NBCSN: Abu Dhabi 2017
So this is it. Race #20 of 20. The last of the season. The last race to be covered by NBCSN and the Legendary Announce Team. The last time we'll see F1 cars without an ugly piece of structure over the cockpit. Perhaps the last time we'll see the well-known F1 logo. The last race of Felipe Massa's career... again. And the last weekend you'll have to listen to me whine moan and complain about Formula 1 for the season. Here's the track map for the 2017 Grand Prix of Abu Dhabi:
I've said it before, I'll say it again probably: it looks like a great track to drive on. It's proven, however, to be not so much of a great place for a race. Like so many Tilkedromes, of course. Maybe now that Liberty Media owns F1 (essentially) someone else will get a chance to design a race course? Please?
Weather should be dry and hot, perfect for the Mercs, assuming they're not bolting 2018 test pieces onto their car for race experience. Even then, they'll probably run away and hide. But who knows? Not I, for I am just a humble fan.
Who will be sad when the race is over, for it means that Steve Matchett and David Hobbs will no longer be providing coverage for Formula 1, for the first time since I became a fan in the modern era... 2004. Those two, along with The Varsha and yes, even Leigh Diffey, have been the voice of F1 for me for 13 years. But ESPN is going to go with the international feed and announcers next year, rendering the LAT mute... and moot. So here, for the final time, is the broadcast schedule for the Legendary Announce Team:
Friday
Practice 2: 7a - 830a live on NBCSN
Saturday
Quals: 7a - 830a live on NBCSN
Sunday
2017 Grand Prix of Abu Dhabi: 630a - 9a live on NBCSN
All times Pond Central. Accept no substitutes. Coverage of Quals will likely be delayed as Saturday is when I'm going to the Old Home Pond for the Thanksgiving meal.
So there we go. Let's all get ready, shall we?
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November 19, 2017
Random Anime Pictures #140: I Did NOT Expect That
As I've gotten more interested in the past months about anime-based figures, I've seen a bunch based on characters from something called "To Love-Ru." They've mostly been very good-looking, and there's a series of figures that are probably the best-looking I've ever seen... ridiculously expensive, waaaaaay out of my price range, but the best-looking. But I knew nothing about the series except that one pink-haired character wears a weird hat. So with so little to look at this season, I decided to give it a shot.
more...
-To Love-Ru Darkness, Ep01
Never mind the zombies being attacked by giant plants. A careful eye will notice that the pink-haired schoolgirl is... um... crouched in an interesting location. This is not by accident. TLRD is perhaps the single-most ecchi anime I've ever seen that isn't flat-out hentai. And it was broadcast! "But Wonderduck," I hear you say and really, are you using whitening strips, your teeth look great, "if that picture is representative, it isn't that over-the-top, right?"
No. It's even more than that. Remember the High School of the Dead OVA? That was nothing in comparison to this show. Now, nothing I've shown you here is out-of-the-ordinary... or even particularly worth commenting on. That's because I don't dare put the NSFW stuff on the front page. I warn you again: if you click "more", you're going into NSFW-land.
Last warning: beyond here is NSFW.
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November 17, 2017
Random Anime Pictures #139: Ohfertheluvva...
-Aquarion Logos, Ep05
See, now they're just pandering. A beach episode. The fifth episode of twenty-six, and already it's a beach episode. Then the best shot of the whole thing is also the one where the Tagonist is most fully dressed. I don't understand how this show thinks at all.
Well, okay, maybe I do a bit.
This was the episode where everybody that wasn't a die-hard Aquarion fan jumped ship... and apparently, some of the die-hards did, too. I know I'm not going to go any farther with it. What's the point? I don't like giant robot/mecha as a rule, I don't like shouted special attack names, and I really don't like shows throwing in beach episodes less than a fifth of the way through the run. I mean sure, the fanservice is nice, but if the series is this desperate this early, the trainwreck that's coming is going to be immense. No thanks.
Nope. Ain't gonna work.
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November 15, 2017
Ducks In Anime: Out Of The Darkness, A Light
-Aquarion Logos, Ep02
Despite my advancing years, my eye can still be distracted by cute representatives of the opposite sex, even to the point of watching an anime series solely because of a character design. Oh, it doesn't happen often... I usually require something more than that, like a storyline or grand concept that is appealing... but upon occasion everything will line up just right. As I wasn't really paying attention to anything this season... I still intend to finish up Girls Last Tour... I said "what the hell," and began watching Aquarion Logos.
This was not the best idea I ever had. I acknowledge that giant robot shows can in theory be interesting and enjoyable. Having acknowledged that, I need to state that Aquarion Logos does nothing to prove that theory correct. Lots of combining small ships to make a big one, lots of yelled attack moves, flat-out awful animation levels, a stupid stupid plot... really, the only worthwhile thing in it is the Tagonist, Maia (above). Yes, tagonist. She's not on the side of Right And Good, so she can't be the protagonist, but she's not on the side of Darkness and Evil anymore either, so she's no antagonist. So she's a Tagonist.* Oh, and the cafe that's a front for the Good Guys' Giant Robot Hangar has a row of rubber duckies, as seen up top there. Sadly, even the combination of cut-off jeans shorts and rubber duckies cannot save this series.
* Yes, I know I'm not using protagonist and antagonist correctly. Just roll with it.
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November 13, 2017
F1 Update!: Brazil 2017
A brilliantly sunny day greeted the F1 Circus as they made their way to the grid, led by the Mercedes of Valterri Bottas. The Finn was going to have to carry the banner for the Silver Arrows on this day as his world champion teammate, Lewis Hamilton, was starting from the pit lane after binning his car in Quals. He had his work cut out for him as the two Ferraris were right behind him in second and third, led by Seb Vettel, and the Italian team was desperate for a win. Every team wants to end a season on a high note, true, but Ferrari actually led both championships for a substantial portion of the season before watching Merc run away from them. Face needs must be saved. So what occurred? What transpired? THIS is your F1Update! for the 2017 Grand Prix of Brazil!
*SOMEONE SET US UP THE BOMB: After his visit to the barriers during Qualifying, Lewis Hamilton was going to be starting from somewhere around last place on the grid, so the team made the strategic decision to actually start him from the pit lane. Why is this important? Because it allowed changes to be made to the car's setup. The Mercedes has proven to be rather persnickity regarding the weather this season. It isn't fond of cool track temperatures, being unable to get its tires up to operating levels, so the team has to do everything it can to get heat into them. This slows the car down. The weather for Quals was cool and not sunny, so both Mercs were set up for that... and it got Bottas the pole. However, race day came and it was both warm AND sunny; the track temperature was right in the Merc's sweet spot. After the end of Qualifying, however, the cars go into parc ferme and cannot be worked on or adjusted in any way unless there's a safety issue, and even then it's a case of "like for like." The race Powers That Be have to approve the switching of parts, and will watch the change like a hawk. THEN the car goes back into parc ferme. That was Bottas' position. But Hamilton? Since he was already going to be starting from the back, starting from the pit lane would be no great hardship, and it meant that the parc ferme rules did not apply; they could make any changes they desired. And they desired to change the setup for hot weather. Oh, and to replace almost everything on the car, from floor to engine. It would make a substantial difference.
*LIGHTS OUT: Once the five red lights went out, we had the usual drag race to the first turn between Bottas on the outside and Vettel on the inside. Neither driver had great starts, wheelspin being the thing to begin with. It was Vettel who managed to get the power down to the asphalt first and he passed Bottas as they reached the braking zone for Turn 1. One turn later, all became chaos. Smiley Ricciardo spun his Red Bull, and behind him Kevin Magnussen and Stoffelwaffle did Very Bad Things to each other. This would call out the Safety Car, and only instants after the notification came out we had another wreck, this time when Lettuce Grosjean lost his Haas and broke False Esteban! into the kittylitter. This would prove terminal for False Esteban!'s race, bringing to an end a remarkable string: ever since he began racing single-seaters in the 2014 Formula 3 season, he had never retired from a race. Alas, no more.
*SAFETY CAR: As Berndt Maylander was woken from his dark slumber, Lewis Hamilton had to be chortling with glee. Starting from the pit lane had allowed him to totally avoid all the crashing and the wrecking and the glavin! and find himself in 13th. Seven positions in just a couple of laps? Not bad. Many changed tires during the Safety Car, but not the leaders, and not Hamilton, who began the race on the Soft tires (the hardest compound on offer) and looked to be going long in the first stint, and finish up with a sprint on the ultramegawowthesearesoft tires. The Safety Car also had the effect of gathering the field back together. Hamilton may have been in 13th place, but he was only seven seconds behind Vettel.
*READY SET GO: After the restart, Vettel managed to open a two second gap to Bottas, but no farther. However, they began pulling away from the rest of the field; they both wanted the win so badly there was never any thought to playing it safe or protecting the tires. As they ran away and hid, the cameras slid back to where the action was... with another silver-colored car.
*CHAAAARGE!: On Lap 5, when the Safety Car went away, Hamilton was 13th. On Lap 6, he was 12th, having passed Pleasant Stroll. On Lap 7, he was 11th, getting by Sony Ericcson. Lap 8 saw our champion leave Pierre Ghastly behind for 10th. You can be forgiven for thinking that Lap 9 would see him in 9th place. In reality, he was 8th, having passed both Carlos Sainz and Nico Hulkenberg. He then began to slack off, taking five laps to pass Sergio Perez for 7th. Now yes, Hamilton was in a much better car than everybody he passed, but that was still some mighty fine driving. And it wasn't over yet... at this point, Hamilton asked his crew a stunning question: "Is Vettel getting away?" In fact, he was only 16 seconds behind the leader at this point.
*PITS: By Lap 29, all the leaders had pitted for fresh tires... and Lewis Hamilton was leading the Brazilian Grand Prix (that's a lot of Grand Prix!). And he would hold that lead for 14 laps until he had to make his one stop for tires. He'd rejoin in 5th place, nine seconds behind Embryo Verstappen's Red Bull.
*NO... HE CAN'T, CAN HE?: On fresh tires, Hamilton immediately began reeling in the youthful Dutchman. On Lap 59, he took 4th place and immediately set off for the Ferrari of Kimi Raikkonen only two seconds ahead. He would begin hounding the veteran, narrowing the lead to as little as 0.9 seconds. Once Hamilton locked up going into a turn, however, it was clear that his remarkable day had come to an end, his tires cooked and the Merc wobbling.
*THE END: When the race finally ended, the top four finishers, Vettel-Bottas-Raikkonen-Hamilton, were covered by less than 5.50 seconds. There was then a 27 second gap back to Verstappen. In many ways, this 1 - 3 result was exactly what Ferrari needed. But there had to be a dark cloud hanging around, caused by Hamilton's storming drive. It wouldn't have been hard to imagine the champion on the podium... or if he had began the race near his normal grid position, running away and hiding from the rest of the field.
Next race is the last race, Abu Dhabi in two weeks. We'll see ya then for the finish!
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November 12, 2017
Delay Delay Delay
So last night I went to sleep early, intending to wake up in time to watch the F1 race live form Brazil. Instead, I had a nightmare of a night. From around midnight to maybe 6am-ish, I was basically up every hour dealing with... um... a warp core breach.
I've had more fun. Anyway, the amount of sleep I had last night was insufficient to my needs which also led to massive headache that made me... um... cranky. I had to cancel brunch with the folks, sort of moved around in a daze until I sat down to watch the race around noon, then promptly dozed off with a sandwich in my hand. Once I woke up, I rewound the race, started it again, then dozed off at about the halfway point. Didn't miss much, though. Now that I've watched the thing, I'm going to go back to bed. When I awake, I suspect I'm going to feel like a overcooked strand of mafaldine.
You can probably see where I'm going with all this. It's not like the race was all that exciting anyway. Bear with me, I am old and tired.
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November 11, 2017
F1 Quals: Brazil 2017
Well, quals hasn't aired yet here, but I've seen the important bits! Here's the provisional grid for the 2017 Grand Prix of Brazil:
So! Race in the morning then! Enjoy enjoy enjoy!
| Pos |
Driver | Car | Q1 | Q2 | Q3 |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Valtteri Bottas | Mercedes | 1:09.452 | 1:08.638 | 1:08.322 |
| 2 | Sebastian Vettel | Ferrari | 1:09.643 | 1:08.494 | 1:08.360 |
| 3 | Kimi Räikkönen | Ferrari | 1:09.405 | 1:09.116 | 1:08.538 |
| 4 | Embryo Verstappen | Red Bull Racing |
1:09.820 | 1:09.050 | 1:08.925 |
| 5 | Smiley Ricciardo | Red Bull Racing | 1:09.828 | 1:09.533 | 1:09.330 |
| 6 | Sergio Perez | Force India Mercedes | 1:10.145 | 1:09.760 | 1:09.598 |
| 7 | Fernando Alonso | McLaren Honda | 1:10.172 | 1:09.593 | 1:09.617 |
| 8 | Nico Hulkenberg | Renault | 1:10.078 | 1:09.726 | 1:09.703 |
| 9 | Carlos Sainz | Renault | 1:10.227 | 1:09.768 | 1:09.805 |
| 10 | Felipe Retire Already | Williams Mercedes | 1:09.789 | 1:09.612 | 1:09.841 |
| 11 | False Esteban! | Force India Mercedes | 1:10.168 | 1:09.830 | |
| 12 | Lettuce Grosjean | Haas Ferrari | 1:10.148 | 1:09.879 | |
| 13 | Stoffelwaffle | McLaren Honda | 1:10.286 | 1:10.116 | |
| 14 | Kevin Magnussen | Haas Ferrari | 1:10.521 | 1:10.154 | |
| 15 | Brendon Hartley | Toro Rosso | 1:10.625 | DNS | |
| 16 | Herelein Wehrlein | Sauber Ferrari | 1:10.678 | ||
| 17 | Pierre Ghastly | Toro Rosso | 1:10.686 | ||
| 18 | Pleasant Stroll | Williams Mercedes | 1:10.776 | ||
| 19 | Sony Ericsson | Sauber Ferrari | 1:10.875 | ||
| NC | Lewis Hamilton Who? | Mercedes | DNF |
Hamilton threw his car into the barriers after just a few minutes of Q1 had elapsed, ending his day early. He later said that the crash "was very unusual" for him. Well, yeah. Kinda. I'll say this for the newly-minted four-time WC, his wreck had style. He went into Turn 7, the rear of the car broke free, and it looked for all the world that he was drifting the Merc through the turn intentionally. That is, right up until the moment it went rocketing off through the kittylitter and buried itself in the tire barrier. There were some anxious moments as Hamilton didn't reply right away to his pitwall asking if he was okay but eventually he confirmed no injury. He did look at the back of the car for a while before walking off... clearly he thought something broke back there.
Other than that, though? It appears the session wasn't all that exciting. Sure, Bottas took pole at the very last moment from Vettel, but... well. There are a LOT of penalties to be applied before the start tomorrow... Smiley Ricciardo gets a 10-spot, for example... so that'll jumble things up a little more for tomorrow's race. Weather is supposed to be warm and dry... darn it.
So! Race in the morning then! Enjoy enjoy enjoy!
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November 08, 2017
F1 on Somewhere or Other: Brazil 2017
Brazil. Not my favorite race. Oh, I don't hate it the way I hate Hungary... it's much deeper, this distaste I have for Grand Prix of Brazil. The Hungarian Grand Prix, I just dislike the track. Brazil? I hate the entire weekend. But first, here's the track map:
Okay, cool. From all reports, most of the F1 community loves the circuit, loves driving there, finds the place to be a great challenge. So why my bitter antipathy for Interlagos? Back in the old days, when my F1 fandom was shiny and new, Brazil was the last race of the season. That meant that my favorite brand of motorsport was going to be going away for four months, give or take, and it was all Brazil's fault.
I didn't say it was logical.
But because of all that, the weekend always felt gray and overcast, even if it wasn't. Maybe particularly if it wasn't. That we occasionally got reports of drivers or team members being threatened at gunpoint didn't help matters either. But rain is, if not common, then at least not very rare at all, which literally made it gray... and slippery, too! Bonus!
But now Interlagos isn't even the last race on the calendar so my distaste for the circuit doesn't even make sense anymore. Doesn't matter. Don't like it.
I do like the Legendary Announce Team however, and we've only got two more races with them until they are scattered to the winds. Let's enjoy them while we can, right? Here's the broadcast schedule:
Friday
Practice 2: 10a - 1130a live on NBCSN
Saturday
Quals: 830p - 10p decidedly not live on NBCSN
Sunday
2017 Grand Prix of Brazil: 930a - 12n live on NBCSN
All times Pond Central Time. I am disappointed, but not surprised, by the decision to show NASCAR practice instead of F1 Quals live. After all, NBCSN will not have Formula 1 much longer... no reason to hype it up just to have it move to ESPN next season. And thus we get Quals 12 hours late. However, if you're in the mood, Practice and Quals will be shown right before the race back-to-back-to-back. I'll still have the normal Quals report up Saturday morning/afternoon, whichever. I'm not even going to promise the F1U! for Sunday... best laid plans and all that, and my track record hasn't been great recently.
But it'll be here! I promise. See you eventually then!
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November 05, 2017
I Blame Pixy. And J Greely. And Maybe Greyduck Too. (UPDATED)
Based on reviews, blurbs, comments, and otherwise out-and-out love given out over the years by the people in the title, I just bought the audiobook version of Storm Front, the first of The Dresden Files series, by Jim Butcher.
There are 15 books in the series.
I'm a inveterate completionist.
What have you done to me? I thought we were friends, man.
UPDATE: J says below that the first books would probably be improved if they got someone good to read them, audiobook-wise. They got someone good: James Marsters. Who?
Oh. Spike! From the Buffyverse. Guess what? He's really damn good. Stage trained, studied at Juilliard, that sorta thing. His take on Harry Dresden as a worn-down, kinda tired private eye-kinda figure is... well, I can't really say. I mean, I think it's perfect, but not having read the books, I can't compare it to my "mental reading", y'know? To me, it works perfectly.
The first chapter is actually on yootoob, y'all that know the books give it a listen, tell me what you think.
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November 03, 2017
Doki Doki Literature Club
Yeah, I know. "Wonderduck, another dating sim?" Yep! And not only that, it's about as formulaic as they come! I mean take a look:
more...
Left to right, you've got the tsundere, the shy bookworm, the genki childhood friend, and the school princess who's also the president of this little club. Of course, you're the only guy in sight. We've seen this anime, this manga, this visual novel, before, dozens of times really. These same characters too... oh, the character designs might be different, but really they're the same.
So why did this free game that's available on Steam hook me so darn hard that it got into my dreams? I want to make this clear: there are spoilers ahead. Not massive ones, but spoilers nevertheless. If you're curious about this, but you don't want spoilers, allow me to direct you to friend Ben's post over on the mysteriously named Midnite Tease. He's got the stuff.
And, if you want to go into it with as little information as possible, I salute you and don't even mind if you're not going to read the rest of this post. Here's some music for you.
Quite possibly the happiest, most bubbly tune ever... perfect for DDLC!
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November 02, 2017
Still Around, Still Alive
Just... really busy, really really tired, and for a couple of nights this week I had Very Bad Dreams. Things should loosen up a bit soon, however, and I'll write over the weekend. Hold on until then, okay? Thanks!
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October 31, 2017
F1 Update!: Mexico 2017
A perfect day for racing greeted the F1 Fiesta as they sat on the Autodromo Hermanos Rodriguez's grid. A tense atmosphere still hung over the crowd though, as everybody knew they were about to see a showdown that would probably decide the World Driver's Championship. On pole was Ferrari's Seb Vettel, who needed to finish at least 2nd to have any chance of extending the fight to Brazil. Next to him on the front row was the latest wunderkind to take the Formula 1 world by storm, Red Bull's Embryo Verstappen. He had no dog in the hunt for the Championship, but very much wanted a win. And behind them was the Mercedes of Lewis Hamilton, points leader who only needed to finish fifth or above to clinch his fourth driver's championship... or have Vettel finish below 2nd. These three could honestly be expected to not hold back in the nearly kilometer long run to the first turn... the first car there would have an advantage for the rest of the race on the narrow Mexico City circuit. So what happened? THIS is your F1Update! for the 2017 Grand Prix of Mexico!
*LIGHTS OUT: The drag race was exactly as exciting as predicted. The big names were three wide as they piled into the braking zone for the first turn, but as Vettel had the inside line, he held primacy of place... for about twenty feet or so. Coming out of Turn 1, Verstappen pulled alongside the Ferrari, and to the left which put him on the inside for the approaching Turn 2. Vettel was slightly balked by the Red Bull, made very light contact with it, and had to back off the accelerator a touch to avoid anything worse. This loss of momentum opened the door for Hamilton to come charging through, taking second away from the German as they barreled into Turn 3. Then there was carbon fiber flying everywhere and Hamilton's Mercedes was limping. The Ferrari had lost half its front wing, the silver car had a flat right rear tire, and Verstappen could be heard going "ha ha" as he galloped away.
*QUESTIONS QUESTIONS: The aerodynamically impaired Ferrari made it back to the pits well before Hamilton... it could still go fast after all, it just didn't have much in the way of downforce for the turns. A new nose was slapped on, as was the hardest compound of tire on offer for the weekend... clearly Vettel was looking at going the rest of the race on one set of rubber. Mercedes decided to do the same for their car. Both drivers were at the back of the field, with Hamilton in dead last. The question now became very simple: could Vettel fight his way up to second place from the rear of the field? The corollary to that was "could Hamilton do the same thing"? Neither man had a chance to win, of course... or did they? Embryo wasn't known for his... um... stability behind the wheel, after all.
*WHOLE AND BROKEN: Soon enough, the early answers to the questions posed came in... "maybe" and "nope." The driver of the Prancing Horse began to pull himself up the field, slowly but surely, and seeming to have to fight tooth and hoof for every position. His encounter with Massa for 15th place nearly saw them come together in what must have been a terrifying moment for Vettel... to lose a shot at the championship because frickin' MASSA wouldn't get out of his way? Ridiculous! On the other end of the spectrum was Hamilton's Mercedes... stuck in 19th place for so long that Verstappen lapped him on Lap 20. As it turned out, the collision with Vettel caused more damage than was immediately apparent. The Merc's diffuser had been broken, either by the impact or by the flailing tire, in such a way that much of its effectiveness was gone.
*HOW DO YOU SAY 'KABLAMMO' IN FRENCH?: First came Smiley Ricciardo's Red Bull, which ate another turbocharger. Then Brendan Hair-tly's Toro Rosso came to a stop on the side of the track, flames issuing from the exhaust pipe. Nico Hulkenberg's Renault died via KERS failure, the team instructing him to exit via the nose of the car and to jump off so as to not ground himself. Carlos Sainz's French car retired from self-inflicted handling issues. This left only Pierre Ghastly's Toro Rosso and Verstappen's Red Bull as cars with Renault power still running... and both pit walls were terrified by what they could see was coming. Hair-tly's failure brought out a Virtual Safety Car on Lap 31. This allowed both Vettel and Hamilton to throw out their one-stopper plans and put on fast tires. Verstappen's lead over second-place Valterri Bottas was some 11 seconds at this point.
*AH THE CONFIDENCE OF YOUTH: Around Lap 40 or so, Red Bull's pit wall instructed Young Master Verstappen to perhaps slow down just a touch so as not to risk angering the engine gods. A lap later came the radio call "Okay Embryo, so that (lap time) was the same as the previous lap." A moment or two of silence, then the Dutch driver responded with "I'm really sorry." For some reason, the obvious laughter in his voice suggested he wasn't very sorry at all.
*BETTING ON RED: With Verstappen dominating the race, all eyes turned to the Ferrari of Seb Vettel. By Lap 35, the halfway point, he was in 8th place. In most circumstances, this would have been a fantastic finishing position considering the problems at the start... but he may as well have been on the Moon for all it was worth to him. He continued to pull his way up the field, the new fast tires making all the difference in the world. On Lap 57 of 71, he managed to make his way past the Force India of False Esteban! to take fourth position. Far behind him, both in track position and in time, Hamilton had dragged his broken Merc up to 10th.
*OH. OH DEAR.: Vettel was in fourth, but needed desperately to reach second. It was a subdued pit wall that radioed him, letting him know that his teammate, Kimi Raikkonen, was in third. Normally, this would be a GOOD thing for the German, because team orders would force the Finn to give the position up. But the pit wall continued, this time with the bad news: he was 24 seconds behind Raikkonen. Left unsaid was the gap from Raikkonen to Bottas: another 27 seconds. Vettel's reply really left nothing more to be said: "Oh mamma mia." Stereotypical Italian comment aside, the German could not relax. He needed to be closer to his teammate so he could realistically be allowed past if Bottas had problems, and of course four Renault-powered cars were already out of the race, three of the retirements power-unit related. For all his dominance on the day, Verstappen could be out in the blink of an eye, and Vettel would have his second place finish.
*WITHER HAMILTON: You know it's a bad day for Mercedes when their lead driver and three-time world champion is fighting Fernando Alonso's McLaren for 9th place, but there they were, throwing haymakers and uppercuts at each other. Alonso later said that he thought the McLaren was "the best chassis on the grid", and he may be right... certainly he was able to hold off a damaged Mercedes for some good clean racing. Probably the best of the day, truth be told. Alonso did eventually come out behind in their little tete a tete, but that meant that he had only managed to climb some nine positions on the day instead of 10. Not too bad for a car with a wind-up engine in it.
*THE END: Vettel managed to get within 15 seconds of his podium-bound teammate, but no closer. Raikkonen was a whopping 33 seconds behind Bottas' second-place Mercedes. But 20 seconds ahead of them all was Embryo Verstappen's Red Bull, taking his second race victory of the season. But nobody really noticed that, because all eyes were on Hamilton who was celebrating his fourth world driver's championship.
The next race is in two weeks in Brazil... see you then!
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October 29, 2017
Mexico Delay
My mood has gotten blacker and blacker as the day has gone on, to the point where I feel like I'm spitting nails at the moment.
I'm not going to do the Mexico GP writeup tonight. That'd just be a bad idea.
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October 28, 2017
F1 Quals: Mexico 2017
Before we go any farther, Pierre Ghastly had engine problems in Practice 3 and could not make the quals session. The two McLarens didn't turn laps in Q2 as a strategic move to save tires... and because they're going to be getting penalties for engine component changes. And Brendon Hairtley's engine released the magic smoke before he could set a time in Q2. If you get to see the in-car video, there's this really fast "zzzzip!" sound just as the engine stops being an engine. My first thought was the turbo let go, but who knows?
Ah, Mexico City. Where the Government is confused, the food spicy, the music raucous, the alcohol dangerous, the air gray, and the oxygen sparse. And the racing fast and furious... and the home of the 2017 Grand Prix of Mexico. Here's the provisional grid:
| Pos |
Driver | Car | Q1 | Q2 | Q3 |
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Sebastian Vettel | Ferrari | 1:17.665 | 1:16.870 | 1:16.488 |
| 2 | Embryo Verstappen | Red Bull Racing |
1:17.630 | 1:16.524 | 1:16.574 |
| 3 | Lewis Hamilton | Mercedes | 1:17.518 | 1:17.035 | 1:16.934 |
| 4 | Valtteri Bottas | Mercedes | 1:17.578 | 1:17.161 | 1:16.958 |
| 5 | Kimi Räikkönen | Ferrari | 1:18.148 | 1:17.534 | 1:17.238 |
| 6 | False Esteban! | Force India Mercedes | 1:18.336 | 1:17.827 | 1:17.437 |
| 7 | Smiley Ricciardo | Red Bull Racing |
1:18.208 | 1:17.631 | 1:17.447 |
| 8 | Nico Hulkenberg | Renault | 1:18.322 | 1:17.792 | 1:17.466 |
| 9 | Carlos Sainz | Renault | 1:18.405 | 1:17.753 | 1:17.794 |
| 10 | Sergio Perez | Force India Mercedes | 1:18.020 | 1:17.868 | 1:17.807 |
| 11 | FelipeNot Nasr | Williams Mercedes | 1:18.570 | 1:18.099 | |
| 12 | Pleasant Stroll | Williams Mercedes | 1:18.902 | 1:19.159 | |
| 13 | Brendon Hairtley | Toro Rosso | 1:18.683 | DNF | |
| 14 | Fernando Alonso | McLaren Honda | 1:17.710 | No Time | |
| 15 | Stoffelwaffle | McLaren Honda | 1:18.578 | No Time | |
| 16 | Sony Ericsson | Sauber Ferrari | 1:19.176 | ||
| 17 | Herelein Wehrlein | Sauber Ferrari | 1:19.333 | ||
| 18 | Kevin Magnussen | Haas Ferrari | 1:19.443 | ||
| 19 | Lettuce Grosjean | Haas Ferrari | 1:19.473 |
Before we go any farther, Pierre Ghastly had engine problems in Practice 3 and could not make the quals session. The two McLarens didn't turn laps in Q2 as a strategic move to save tires... and because they're going to be getting penalties for engine component changes. And Brendon Hairtley's engine released the magic smoke before he could set a time in Q2. If you get to see the in-car video, there's this really fast "zzzzip!" sound just as the engine stops being an engine. My first thought was the turbo let go, but who knows?
Now then... Embryo Verstappen set his fast time in Q3 about five minutes too early. It didn't look like it'd matter much... it was a helluva lap, only bettered once this weekend... and that was in Q2, and set by him anyway. Hell, he also had the "ultimate sector time" for all three sectors, too. Then Lewis Hamilton took a shot at it... and couldn't come close. And looked like it, too... the Mercedes was not performing well today.
But Seb Vettel was the last man on track, the Ferrari was performing well, looking firmly planted to the asphalt, just in need of a brave driver to take advantage. And he did, in an astonishing pole lap that almost wasn't. According to Vettel afterwards, the car nearly got away from him in Turn 6, forcing him to drop down a gear. Somehow, it didn't cost him enough time to knock him off pole.
I didn't think he could do it, honestly. Verstappen's lap was so good, I thought only the Mercedes on a GOOD day would be able to beat it... and the Mercs were NOT having a good day, as mentioned earlier. They say a good driver can outdrive his car... and that may be so, but I've really only seen one driver do that consistently: Fernando Alonso. Vettel did that today, I think... and it's not like the Ferrari is a Minardi or something. Kids, ask your parents about Minardi.
So the race is in the afternoon, Lewis Hamilton only needs to finish 5th to clinch the Driver's Championship, so he's gotta be relatively happy right now. Vettel needs to win out to have any chance at all, over and above Hamilton having mechanical problems, so he's gotta be relatively happy right now... except the last time Vettel was on pole and Verstappen was second, they were in Singapore. We all remember how that turned out.
Right, race in the afternoon! See ya after!
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October 27, 2017
Random Anime Pictures #138: Took Me Long Enough...
Seriously, what took me so long? I'm not even gonna talk about the show. If you've ever watched a superhero movie, cartoon, or read a comic book, you've gotta watch this.
"It's Plus Ultra!"
-All Might.
Yes, yes it is.
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October 25, 2017
F1 on TV: Mexico 2017
The races haven't been great since Formula 1 returned to Mexico in 2015, but the spectacle has been real! Let's take a look at the track map for this new old track.
The teams tend to load up on downforce here despite the two ridiculously long straights... there's a lot of turns to be contended with... and yet, that downforce still doesn't slow the cars down a whit. Part of the reason for that is Mexico City itself: it's 2200m above sea level, more than 700m higher than the next circuit (Brazil), and some 2197m above Abu Dhabi. Because the circuit is so high, there's a corresponding thinning of the air. That means less aerodynamic drag, and while that also means less downforce, it's not like a F1 car doesn't have oodles to spare. The engines have to work harder here, too, because of the lack of air... the turbochargers spin up to 10% faster to make up for it... so don't be surprised if we see some grenading going on. There will also be a serious amount of fan insanity in the greatest stadium section in Formula 1.
It is literally a stadium! Baseball, to be specific... home plate would be just offscreen right of this picture. It seats 40,000 fans, and the podium ceremony is held here. Dear god, if Sergio Perez makes the podium the crowd will be able to be heard here in Duckford.
The Legendary Announce Team will be at it again... here's the broadcast schedule:
Friday
Practice 1: 10a - 1130a live on NBCSN
Practice 2: 2p - 330p live on NBCSN
Saturday
Quals: 1p - 3p live on NBCSN
Sunday
2017 Grand Prix of Mexico: 2p - 4p live on NBC proper.
All times Pond Central, of course. Seeing Practice 1 up there came as a pleasant surprise... NBCSN is going all-out for their last network weekend, I suppose. See ya after!
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October 24, 2017
This Time, A Year Ago...
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