Break out your slickers and wellies, THIS is F1 UPDATE!

*RAIN:  The race started in the rain.  Then it stopped.  Then it poured.  Then the race got silly.  Only three cars were still on the lead lap when the race ended, and the winner, some bloke named Lewis Hamilton, was 68 seconds ahead of 2nd place.  Yet at times, it was the worst car on track that was turning laps seven seconds faster than the leader, and you had one driver pass two cars for position in one move TWICE.  We've said it before, and we'll say it again in the future, but we love F1 in the wet.

*EVERYONE LOVES A THREE-WAY:  After today's results, there are three drivers with 48 championship points: Hamilton, Raikkonen and Massa.  Kubica has 46.  This one is wiiiiiide open.

*...RIGHT DOWN THEIR LEG:  Massa spun four or five times.  Kimi ended up fourth, but knows he was lucky to be even that high.  Ferrari as a team looked like a bunch of amateurs with their strategies.  And it didn't have to be that way: until the first pitstop, Kimi was only a couple of car-lengths behind Hamilton.  They pitted at the same time, they left the pits at the same time, and two laps later, Raikkonen was seven seconds behind (see Mooooo-ooove of the Race), and it was only a question of "would the cars stay on the track?"  Nightmare fuel for the tifosi, and a shot in the arm for McLaren.

*DRIVER OF THE RACE: By all rights, Lewis Hamilton should win this.  It isn't every day a race is won by 68 seconds, y'know.  Any other race, a performance like that would earn him the DotR honors without any questions whatsoever.  But it isn't every day that the worst car on the grid ends up finishing third, too, and a lot of the reason for that is the driver... Rubens Barrichello.  His first podium finish since the 2005 USGP (when only six cars took the green flag), and Honda's first podium since Hungary 2006 (Jenson Button, win)?  Sure, part of it was that they gambled with full-wet tires even though the sun was coming out, but what the heck?  Congrats, Rubens!  If anybody deserves a break, it's you.

*TEAM OF THE RACE:  McLaren.  1st-5th and you win by over a minute?  Yep, you get the TotR award, but only because everybody else blew chunks. 

*MOVE OF THE RACE:  While everybody else looked like they were driving on ice (except for Hamilton, of course), Grizzly Nick Heidfeld was zipping around the track like he had studded tires.  Around lap 20, he was in 6th place, behind Toyota's Timo Glock and the Renault of HWMNBN.  Heading into a turn, he banzais himself around Glock to the outside, then zips past HWMNBN to the inside... in the same turn!  Good enough to win the MotR right there, but he wasn't finished yet.  Seven laps later, he was behind the dual Finns of Kovaleinninninnie and Raikkonen (3rd and 2nd, respectively).  Again, Heidfeld disposed of both of them at the same time for his second 2-car pass of the race.  Ballsy stuff from Grizzly Nick, considering the track condition at the time, and the combination should be in the running for Move(s) of the Year.

*MOOOOOO-OOOVE OF THE RACE:  Celebrating the best of the worst of the race, the Moooooo-ooove generally goes to the driver who makes the Art of F1 Driving look more like the Scientology of F1 Driving: a laughingstock, in other words.  Today, though, we can't blame the drivers for their lowing and cud-chewing: the weather caused that.  However, there was one incident that just screamed "Mooo!" in this race.  As the first round of pitstops came near, the rain had stopped but the track was still very wet (Silverstone is very wide, and mostly flat, with no camber at all.  As a result, water on pavement just sits there until it steams off).  A couple of laps later, Smarmy Windsor reported that it was raining in the paddock.  Kimi Raikkonen trailed Lewis Hamilton by about a second as they both came in to pit.  Lewis took fuel and new Intermediate tires.  Ferrari, though, sent Kimi back out with fuel only, leaving him with worn Inters.  A lap or so later, they did the same with Massa, revealing that it was a team strategy, not a driver saying "let's do this."  The gamble was that if it stopped raining and began to dry, the worn Inters would suddenly act like slick tires: no grooves, huge contact patch, and great grip.  BUT IT WAS RAINING!  Within two laps, Kimi was seven seconds behind Hamilton, and his chances of winning were pretty much gone.  The worn tires surely also helped Massa with his imitation of a child's top.  Congratulations, Ferrari!  For screwing up the entire race weekend you deserve the Moooooo-ooove.  No, don't thank us, you deserve it.

*DRIVER QUOTES OF THE RACE:

"If I had kept pushing, I could have lapped the field.  When I came around the last time and saw (my home crowd) standing, I prayed 'just finish, just finish.'  This is my greatest win ever." - Lewis Hamilton

"Always the bridesmaid..." - Grizzly Nick Heidfeld

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!  YEAH!!!  YEAH!!!  YES!!!  YEAH-HAAAAA!" - Rubens Barrichello

"Mrmbllmbl mrrmmblblbbll mrmrmmmmlblbl glubglubglub mrrmbllrmrm." - Kimi Raikkonen

"Remember me?  I had the pole today?  Anyone?" - Heikki Kovaleinninninnie

"I had said that if it rains, anything could happen.  Clever, aren't I?  I came up with that myself." - HWMNBN

"Not quite a podium like France, but after the way I qualified yesterday?  I'll take it." - Jarno Trulli

"_mommie." - Kaz Nakajima

"It was going well... until I ran into the back of Timo Glock." - Nico Rosberg (note: real quote)

"First I got passed by Hamilton within 10 car lengths of the start, then I spun it in Becketts right after.  Boy, that first row qualifying performance sure came in handy, didn't it?" - Mark Webber

"I couldn't see worth a darn.  Maybe racing with my glasses on the outside of my helmet isn't a good idea." - SeaBass

"Well, THAT was exciting, wasn't it?" - Timo Glock

""This Silverstone weekend is one to be wiped out. On Friday I had an accident, yesterday there was the problem in qualifying and today a series of mistakes at all levels.  I wonder if Honda will be hiring next season?" - Felipe Massa

"You know what Heidfeld said to me?  He said 'hey, buddy, why the long face?'  Ha-ha.  Then I decked him.  I'm not in a good mood.  Beached it." - Robert Kubica

"Beached it at home.  Yeah, I'm good." - Jenson Button

"So much for my good performance last race.  Maybe I can get into NASCAR... you can't beach it there." - Nelson Piquet Junior

"Beached it.   Noticing a trend here?" -  Giancarlo Fisichella

"AIEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!" - Adrian Sutil (who lost it in a turn, skidded sideways through the grass, got airborne still moving sideways, flew across the track in front of a Toro Rosso, then beached it.)

"Had it beached for me." - Sebastian Vettel

"Beached him AND me." - David Coulthard's Chin

Maybe not good racing, but fun racing.  Two weeks from now, we can only hope that the GP of Germany will be as exciting!  See you then with the next installment of F1 UPDATE!

Assuming we don't beach it.

Posted by: Wonderduck at 02:31 PM | Comments (5) | Add Comment
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